Zumba

I got a call from Hubs this am. He says.."Where did that Christmas tree come from in the garage?". I say..."What Christmas tree?". He says..."Come on Kerry, there is a giant Christmas tree in our garage". I say.."Would you believe the Christmas fairy dropped it by?". He is quiet. I say.."How did you see that Christmas tree anyway?". He says..."Cause it's in the garage". I say..."It's our Christmas tree". He says..."I put our Christmas tree in storage". I say..."It's our new Christmas tree that I got for 90 percent off". He says.."All you did was bitch about our last tree cause the lights didn't work". I say.."That's because I paid 200 for it, this one was only 20 dollars". He says.."How many Christmas trees do we need???". I say..."Is this why you called me?". He says..."No, I called to tell you that you were snoring last night". I say..."And??". He says..."You always complain about my snoring". He did recently video me snoring and send it to me. The only time I have snored in my life was when I was pregnant. My guess is with my new found can of busted biscuits it is causing my snoring. This is why I have started Zumba.

I've gone to Zumba three times this week. I love the class. My friend and I are always in the back because we screw around a bit. We are like the bad cheerleaders that are always a step behind the others. We laugh and complain that the dancing makes us feel like farting. Then we complain that our bladders feel like there going to fall on the floor. We get cramps and we take potty breaks. They have a scale in the bathroom there. I always get on it thinking I have lost weight. Everyone who does Zumba swears the weight starts to fall off of you. I'm always pissed when the scale has not changed. So tonight I walked out and complained to this lady about not losing weight yet. She says..."Yeah, I have been doing this two years and haven't lost much". I'm screaming "NOOOOOOOOO" in my head. She then says..."I guess I have to give up good food and drinks". I say..."But I'm doing this so I can eat and drink....DAMN IT". Then I point out the perfect skinny girl that could Zumba naked and only her boobs would jiggle. I say..."And we have to look at her". She says.."I know, I didn't look like that when I was 12". I say...."We could trip her". She looks at me funny. I say.."I'm just kidding". I mean geez I only trip her in my head!!!!!!!!! When I get home I go to the mirror and lift up my shirt to see if anything has changed. I wonder if I'm the only one who expects immediate gratification. I'm sticking with this though. By my birthday I'm going to be reporting on all my weight loss!!!!!!!! Now I wrote it down in black and white so I need to get it done!