Sunday, September 16, 2012

We have a hoarder in the house!

The other day I was washing every one's sheets and cleaning up the house. It's funny when your a mom you get this little intuition thing that kicks in. I have recently been looking for certain chips and snacks I have bought. I'm always surprised how fast they go through them. So while doing Blake...aka...The not so charming Prince's sheets. His drawer was calling my name. Only a mom will get this. A thought to check his drawer seriously comes out of no where. So I open the drawer. Low and behold we have a hoarder on our hands!!!! A snack hoarder that is! Remember I have a no drink and food upstairs rule in my house. As you can see my kids are not exactly rule followers. He has three big bags of unopened chips in his drawer and thing of beef jerky. I'd like to ring his not so charming little neck about now. Thank God he is at school so I can calm down a bit. I shop a lot. We have a pantry full of food at all times....there is no reason to hoard any food in this house! So he gets home and I call him out on this. He grins and says...it's his back up food for when we don't have any. I challenge him to tell me one time when we have not had food in the pantry for him to eat. He can't say a word!!!! That is what I thought!!!!!

Friday afternoon I headed out for a much needed girls spa day. I haven't had a spa day since I moved here almost six years ago. I forgot how important these days are. It was five of my girlfriends and I. There is nothing better than hanging out with good girlfriends. We got massages and facials. During my massage they played the "massage" music. I tried to relax. I have a very hard time relaxing. My mind is always going 90-nothing. So I did relax but I couldn't shut my overactive imagination down. I thought maybe I will try to meditate. So meditate I did. I meditated about being young with no Hub's and no kids. On a beach with my girlfriends with not a worry in the world. Don't judge it's just a fantasy. I just wish I would have really enjoyed and taken those times of my life in more. During my facial the girl told me I have great skin for my age. I seem to really hate when people give me a compliment followed by a "for your age" crack. Great skin would have been just fine. You can just stop there...no need to throw the age thing in the mix.  So I tell her I'm getting concerned about some lines that won't go away. Especially the "MOM, mad line" between my eyes. There is no make-up that will cover that shit up anymore. She tells me I should do botox on that line. She tells me she is a botox regular. Remember I'm getting a facial so I really can't see her face. After I'm done I go back to the super great showers and bathroom to clean up. I really do just want to move right into this place. She comes in and calls my name. She hands me a card with a name of the doc that does her face. I'm looking at her frozen face with her lips that look super un natural and her face that looks scary frozen thinking OMG!!!!! She leaves and I throw the card away. Now don't get me wrong I have seen some girls who have botox and lips and they look natural and great. This girl not so much. My fear is vanity would kick me in the ass and I would end up looking like her. I'm still on the fence with the whole botox thing. Anyway a whole day without my kids pecking at me was bliss. Sometimes I feel my kids are like chickens...I would be the corn that they peck at all day. Pecking every last kernel off me. I know most moms get that. We love our kids but they peck the hell out of our sanity all day. They get us doing and saying things we swore we never would. After my spa day I woke up and felt like someone had beat the shit out of me...in a good way. My muscles were super sore. I laid in bed the next day thinking there are some moms out there that never experience the luxury of a spa day. I believe every mom should get a day like this. In a perfect world right???? I myself wish I could afford this luxury at least twice a month. I would be a much better mother if I did.

I thought about shutting this whole blog thing down recently. I have learned that some people are judging me hard by what I write on this. I still have mixed emotions on the whole thing. I will continue to write but maybe in private. This has been huge for me. It has made me realize I love to write even if I'm not great at it. It has gotten things off my mind. It has also been a diary of almost everything I think about and everything going on in my world. I have read back on it since I've been writing it for two years now. I have laughed about so many things I might have forgot about if I didn't write it down. I think it will be fun for my kids to read it when they are age appropriate. They will be able to read back about how much I stressed and worried about them. They will also get that they were total shit birds at times! They will get that I questioned myself at all times and never claimed to be a perfect mom. They will get that marriage and kids are hard work. It's no walk in the park. Anyway I heard people talk about how I go back to bed a lot. They have said things like I'm probably hung over. Now I'm not going to lie, I love to throw down at a good party or love to get my drink on with a girlfriend once in a while. I go back to bed because I have MS. Goggle the symptoms of this. Fatigue is the first thing that will come up. I fight it everyday. I don't talk about MS much because I try to ignore it as much as I can. If I don't go back to sleep I fight foot pain, back pain, and brain fog all day....I am not sleeping off a hang over! With MS comes a lot of other bullshit I won't bore you with. I just want people to know I'm not sleeping off a hang over unless there is a really good party.

Recently my blog got my not so charming prince in question. I do bitch on here about my "know it all" teenager. Some people assumed the worst about him. They took what I said and twisted a very nasty story about it. I'm here to say...not much gets by me. He is not perfect and his mess ups I know about. I have made a ton of mistakes with him and he is doing the normal teenage crap and making some mistakes of his own. He is a great kid with a good heart. I will protect him hands down to anyone that messes with him if he is right. I also believe that if he is wrong he needs to take responsibility. I had him call a friend of mine recently to tell her something he did. I'm not writing about what it is but I made him take responsibility for his part. This about killed him with embarrassment. I believe he learned a lesson. I'm just trying to do the best I can with my kids. I know I'm not perfect nor are they. We are all going to make mistakes. I have learned tons in my life. I wish I could make all my kids decisions for them in the tough "peer pressure" years of life since I know better. I gave my kid a bit of wisdom recently. He may take it or he may need to learn from it. I told him number one don't do anything that you would be embarrassed of if someone found out about it. I told him remember we are from a small town where people know what your doing. I also told him if he doesn't want to do something be alright with saying "NO". I told him if he has the courage to say "NO" almost everyone in the group will say no too. I told him there are lots of people waiting for someone to say no so they can follow that lead. Last I told him that he can always use me as a way out. I told him to say he has a crazy weird mom that finds out everything and I scare the hell out of him. Now don't take this as my kid is bad and you should keep your kids away.  I'm just preparing him for high school situations that we all know a lot of our kids will find themselves in. I also told him I have defended his honor lately even though I know where there is smoke there is fire. I told him if he made me eat these words I will cut him. I'm not kidding! I just have to say the people judging me doesn't bother me that much. I have done my fair share of judging without walking in someones shoes. I'm here to tell you I'm judging myself way harsher than anyone out there. What bothers me is when people twist my words...assuming I'm some hung over drunk instead of someone just trying to fight something I don't really have the time to deal with. Also when they twist the words I say about about my kids....if they turn out awful I will be the first person to tell you to steer your kids clear till I get this under control. If there are people that hate me and my kids just de-friend me and stop reading this! On a brighter note I have met some amazing people here. I have made life time friends that I can say anything to and they don't judge or assume the worst. I'm just a mom trying to the best I can. Sorry for bad grammar and spelling!!!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I love your blog, and I hope you don't quit. However, as a father of a grown son, I would like to know what you're doing changing their sheets - remember what you were saying last week about entitlement? The only way to spoil a kid is by doing things for them that they can do themselves!

Glad you enjoyed your spa day.

kerry said...

Anonymous, I love that you called my ass out about the sheets! I didn't even think about that. Thanks:)))

Chad said...

Kerry, there is no way you should quit. You remind us (well, me) of our humanity. People are going to talk and tell stories of/about you regardless if you write it down or not.

Something I tell everyone:
There are two things never to worry about:
1. Things you can change
2. Things you can't.