I saw this book on Pinterest and the title sucked me in. It's called "Cleaning House...A Mom's 12 month experiment to rid her home of Youth Entitlement". I don't know about you but somewhere I went terribly wrong with my kids. They suffer from this big time. I have been blamed for things I had nothing to do with. I have been asked to do many things that they can do themselves. I have cleaned up after them. I have found drinks and snacks over and over in their rooms. Even though I have a no drink and snack up there rule. My house seems to suffer from a lot of ME ME and ME'S.....and I'm not talking about ME! They tell me what they want and I seem to bend over backwards trying to give them everything they want. Everyone in my house have the latest Nike shoes, the polo shirts, Sperry shoes, and under armor backpacks. They want for nothing. I'm embarrassed writing it down. I can't really blame them. This is the mess I have created. Why wouldn't they do and say all this stuff. I've set the precedence and allowed it to happen. I'm only a few chapters into this book but I can tell it's going to be good. I'm also reading.."Bared to you". Don't judge, a girl needs a some good mommy porn too.
I think this caught my eye because I have a highschooler now. Four short years to go. All us old people know how short those years really are. I find myself thinking...Where has the time gone and what am I going to do with him. My child will be a hot mess when he goes out into the world if I don't change things. I need to teach him a lot in a short amount of time. Like how to flush a toilet to start with. The lady that wrote the book seems to be in the exact same boat as me. Her stories are already so similar. Down to helping too much with homework and her kids just assuming they will be driving around in sports cars. That is driving sports cars and having no idea they will have to work hard to buy one. I know I won't be buying anyone a sports car, I cannot afford one for myself. They have little concept of the value of a dollar or things. I'm excited to see what she does to fix this. My biggest fear is if I don't fix this they will live with me forever!!!!!!!!!!! I know I have taught my kids one thing for sure. That is that I will make everything perfect and I will fix anything.
In the book she says to have a meeting to let them know things are going to change. She says not to try to change everything at once because you will set yourself up for failure. So we were at dinner the other night. I said.....See this Mommy and I pointed at myself. They looked at me funny as if I had three heads. I say this is the old Mommy. You know the one who does everything for you in hopes that you will be successful. I tell them they may not love the new Mommy. They will learn to love her when they have their own kids. I tell them this is going to be harder for me than it is for them. I mean that too. It's much easier to do things yourself rather than ask ten times. Only to get yourself totally upset and yelling like a crazy loon. It's much easier to help with homework to ensure they get a good grade and don't make you look bad. My kids have not really been taught well about losing. Everyone is a winner these days. So I say each of them is going to be responsible for a dinner one night a week. I tell them they will have to tell me what they need. After football and baseball season they will shop for what they need. They will cook it. I will be there to answer questions though. They will serve it and clean it up.
So week one Aidan...aka...pigpen is first up. He picked a pretty easy meal. Pasta shells with an orange sauce that he likes. He did great. The only thing I helped him with was draining the noodles.
He was very serious with his cooking. It was cute to watch.
He seemed very proud of his dinner. I totally blew it though. Without even realizing it I had cleaned up the whole kitchen. I'm a work in progress too. I'm a creature of habits...that is bad ones! I really am very concerned. I have prided myself on being a good parent. I have made a ton of mistakes. I always used to think I had all the time in the world to fix them. I'm getting that time does fly. I don't want a bunch of people to tell me what a great parent I am. This post is not a cry for any compliments. Though others might have been. It is also not a woe is me post. This is saying.....I have really messed up on certain levels. I have done great on many other levels. I think my kids are great for the most part. They are never in trouble and seem to really care about people. It's just plain and simple lazy parenting. My kids do not make their own beds. They don't get their things ready for school. They don't help much with cleaning. They don't really earn things. They don't take care of things. They take a whole lot for granted. They get ungrounded because I can't stand the whining. I give them their phones back because it is easier for me. There is a lot more but I won't bore you. Don't get me wrong this is not all the time. I kind of waver back and forth on this shit as I do exercising and eating right. Usually laziness wins in the end on all counts. I want to change. I need to change for them. Otherwise they are going to go out in the big bad world a hot mess. That and they will be knocking back on my door and I can't have that.
Last night I was so proud of Cole. He was working on homework forever. He never once called for my help. That was until I took a closer look at the computer. He was working hard on creating a Dripping Springs football team for his Xbox on the computer. Once he started homework I heard my name one too many times!!!! Aidan whined about not getting his homework. Cole wanted me to pretty much do his. We had our first major homework meltdown one week into school. Calgon???? Vodka???? Like I said.....we are all a work in progress over here. My days have been crazy from 5:30am-7:45 am. Having three kids at three different schools is for the birds. It calms down from 8am-3pm. This is filled with clean-ups, lots of laundry, a few lunches with friends, maybe a nap, of course a nap, little shit TV, and lots of overwhelming feelings. It gets crazy again from 3pm till about 10pm! Calgon??? Vodka???? I kind of wish there was a rewind button and I could just start over now. I learned from my mistakes I want a re-do! In a perfect world right. So I'm starting over from scratch with these people I live with. I will keep you posted how crazy I get. I have been praying a lot lately for a perfect clone. Just kidding. I have been praying for God to give me strength to guide my children into being hard working responsible adults! I have also prayed for him to make me a hard working responsible adult. Oh yes, and to win the lotto!!!!! I'm excited to continue reading my book. The women that wrote it is very funny too. Her name is Kay Wills Wyma, she is from Dallas. This is where I raised my kids the first part of their lives. I barely remember, I think I was in zombie mode back then. One last thought...do you ever wonder if your kids would have turned out different if someone else raised them??? I do all the time, I'm crazy like that!
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