"You threw my jacket away didn't you???"

 So tomorrow is pajama day at the middle school. We own three pair of footy pajamas....Don't ask! Cole finally settled on the perfect pair after sending pics to his friends. Two of his friends want to borrow the other pairs. I tell Cole that's fine but I want them back. These are my get out of jail free pajams for Gods sake. He is like...."Of course your going to get them back, what are you saying my friends are thieves?". I say.."Um No Drama King, but a few of your friends I see around town in your good clothes". Just saying! He starts to argue and I shut his little dramatic ass down.

 Cole lost his phone last night which turned into a big fight about not being responsible. He actually told me to get my panties out of my wit. After I laughed in my head. Hoping "Wit" doesn't mean what it sounds like. I told him he needed to learn his smart ass phases before he opened his mouth because he sounds like a nit wit. Then I sent him to bed with no dinner. Well he already had dinner but it sounded good. He complained and talked to himself all the way to bed. I did the naaa, naaa, naaa, boo, boo, I can't hear you thing.

Hub's put a tracker on his phone so we were able to track it down. We went to pick it up and the cover was cracked. I asked him if he did that. He responds with a..."Yeah, but your lucky". I think this should be good. I ask.."how it happened and why would I be lucky?".  He tells me he was playing ball and it was in his hand. He then says when he caught the ball it fell. I ask again..."Why would I be lucky because of this?". He says because if it fell the other way it would have cracked the phone. So I say...."Your telling me that you cracked your case and because you didn't crack the phone I'M LUCKY??????". He says..."Yep". I tell him he may want to re think that statement. I tell him first of all....why the H E double hockey sticks would you catch a ball with a phone in your hands?????? Second....Why would you possibly say I was lucky your phone didn't crack????? You are damn lucky your phone didn't break. Third.....Your frickin lucky you have a phone with your new found middle school bad attitude. Last if you don't change your new found tude the phone is mine!!!!!!!!! Yea my head was spinning at this point and green shit was flying out of mouth. SILENCE, CRICKETS!!!!! That is what I thought!!!!! Then he started to cry as if I was the one who was out of line!!!!!!! Lets just say He's not my favorite kid this week.

See this nifty jacket I'm wearing in the picture???? This is Hub's old ass jacket he can't seem to part with. He has had it since we met when dinosaurs walked the earth. I have threatened to get rid of it a few hundred times. I have refused to leave the house with him in it a few times too. So the other night I was watching shit TV. He comes out and says...."Where is my green jacket????". Where is my anything is an immediate buzz kill in my house. I have the same response I always do. It goes something like..."It aint my shit how would I know where it is?". He is like..."No, really Kerry where is it?".  I say...."Really Michael, it's not my shit I wouldn't be caught dead in it, and I have no idea". He looks at me and says "You threw my jacket away didn't you?". I look up and him and say "the thing should be burned, it's not even good enough for coats for kids, and it probably sprouted legs and walked out of here". He says "Your not funny Kerry, I know you got rid of it". I may have yelled......"I didn't get rid of your old ass jacket that is probably tired of being worn anyway". He leaves in a huff and I can finally un pause my DVR!

So tonight Cole is picking out clothes for an after school dance. We kind of end up having a similar conversation as Hub's and I. I won't bore you with the details of that one. Since we are in a rental we have crap in every closet. I tell him to check the closet in the room with the boxes for a shirt. I end up checking the closet.....surprise, surprise! While finding his nice polo, I also find Hub's gross jacket. Now Hubs is over at our old neighbors house having a beer. I have Blake take this picture of me on my camera phone. I send it to Hubs with a ransom note!!!! I may just be an evil genus....It sounds nicer than evil bitch anyway! His response......."Your such a shit bird Kerry". WTF...is a shit bird?????