Sunday, July 31, 2011

Santa's village

Santa's village, this is a place I went to when I was a kid. Twisty got a groupon for some half price tickets. I haven't been there since I was a kid. Since then it closed for awhile and recently re-opened. I'm expecting a spectacular amusement park. For this is how I remembered it as a child. It is amazing how things seen so much bigger and beautiful when you are kid. So we get there and it is much smaller than I remembered. I remember bringing a picnic lunch and eating by water with a giant ferris wheel. The ferris wheel is gone and so is the water.


The kids love it here. We went on a super humid day so most smart people are at home in their air conditioned houses. This for us means no lines for anything.


I had the most fun watching Ella...aka.....the golden jerk ride the rides. Look at that huge smile! Enjoy it while your young, Golden Jerk. Some day you will grow up and realize this magnificate ride that looks so huge is just not that awesome. Shit I kind of sound like a Debbie....Whaaaa, whaaaaa, whaaaa.


We pay a dollar for some peanut butter sticks with bird seed on them to feed the birds. Truth be told we did this to get out of the humidity for a while.


This is me re living my childhood as Twisty and me seem to try and do a lot on this trip.


I like big butts and I can not lie! Whenever you are having a fat day go to your local amusment park. There is always someone there to make you think....it could be worst.

Here is Twisty trying to re live her childhood. She likes to be the center of attention....sad I know!


I like big butts and I can not lie! I really like big butts with tramp stamps.


So we go on the most adult ride there. It looks like a hot air balloon. We ask if we could all sit together. There are five of us. The guy says four to a ride. Cole says...I don't want my Mom to be alone so I will ride with her. Love that he is a child that thinks of someone besides himself. This kid is totally going to be a heart breaker some day!


Twisty is in the next car over with the rest of the crew. So we start up and all the sudden I feel dizzy and sick. I look over at Twisty who looks just as horrified as me. I don't know if I should focus on one thing or close my eyes. They are running this ride extra long since there is no one else in line. I think to myself it will really be embarrassing to puke in this thing. Then I think why when we get older do these rides bother us so much. BULLSHIT I say and I ride and laugh and try to forget that I'm about to puke. Maybe it is because we over think everything the older we get, it is our minds messing with us. So the ride finally ends. I get off as if I have just shot gunned six beers. Twisty feels the same way.....btw, she shouldn't. She is way to young to feel like this. I blame having MS on my stuff, balance is a constant challenge.

This is Santa's slide. It has been there since I was a kid. If I wasn't so lazy I would scan a picture of me on this slide in the seventies. I would have my plaid pants on with my un matching shirt. My blond hair would be a mess and my barrette would be half falling out of my hair. That's just how I rolled back then. Come to think of it that's how I still roll from time to time. I tell the kids I used to go down this same slide when I was a kid. They don't really give a shit. In fact I wonder if they even listened to what I said.

We roll up to Santa's sleigh. Twisty and I still looking like two drunk girls from that last ride. We say to the old guy that we need an easy ride because that last one has us a little shaken. He turns to us and says.....Oh but you girls are so young. Cole....aka...Drama... says.....Hey guy my Mom is 41. Thanks for that Cole, I'm sure the guy did not think I looked a day over 40. This sleigh was pulled by horses. This meant there was that ever so sweet smell of horse shit in the air. It's amazing how you don't remember the smell of horse shit when you are kid. Like I love to say...ignorance is bliss. Our driver was a talker. I'm just wondering why a guy in his sixties with grown children is driving Santa's sleigh. My guess is he is retired and realizes him and his wife no longer have anything in common, he probably does it to get away from her. Or perhaps maybe he is one of those funny guys who like children. I really need to get my mind out of the gutter it seems to rent space in.

We head over to the little petting zoo. It is the same one that was there when I was a kid. Once again much smaller than I remember it. I can't help taking a picture of the little pig butt hole. Now if I had a little pink round butt with a cute pink butt hole I might just post a picture of it too.


I just couldn't help myself on this one! I had to pull my pants up too high. Every time I see a camel my mind goes right back in the gutter.

This is the same pony ride that was there when I was a kid. Aidan...aka...Danger, danger Will Robinson was afraid to ride these ponies. Cole and Ella both go on. I get a good laugh at Twisty who has to walk around in a circle through horse shit.


SERIOUSLY????????? Maybe Aidan had the right idea when he decided against the ponies. How do you explain this to a child???? They are really not familiar with the saying....hung like a horse. Twisty really wanted to take a ride on this one. I have to talk her off the edge and explain I'm the older one so I get first pick. This one is mine.


We finish our day at Santa's village with some good old fashion ice cream. We had such a great day. Going to Chicago in the summer just happens to be some of the best days of my life. I love hanging out with Twisty and the golden jerk. I only wish we could live closer together.


On our way out we see those same mushrooms that have been painted over a dozen times. You can see the paint coming through from the last paint job. I have to tell you. What I love most about this picture is Cole....aka...drama on top of that tall mushroom. This is a kid after my own heart, I would totally have posed the same way on that mushroom.



After writing this post I can only think...I almost wish we aged in reverse. Think of how much more we would enjoy life. We wouldn't be so insecure. We would learn to enjoy the good things in life and take them all in. We would appreciate our young healthy bodies when we had them. We would spend more time with the people we love. We would do and say everything we ever wanted. We would take more chances and just enjoy smelling the roses. Life goes fast, I know I'm showing my age now. Take time to enjoy it. Quit worrying about the woulda, coulda, shoulda! Maybe I should take my own advice. What makes me sad is I'm raising a teenager in this time. They are prisoners to their phones, the Internet, and facebook. I feel that he is missing out on some of the best times of his life. He seems to be only halfway present through life. It's almost sad that life has come to this......Whaaaaaa, Whaaaaaa!


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