I have a very long list of what I ask the Universe for. I'm not giving up though. I hate list but here it is.....
1....I have asked the Universe for perfect kids....Un-popular book worms. The kind of kids who turn into Steve Jobs later in life. I don't think the Universe is listening. I have popular kids, who are making mistakes and are not straight A students....At least two of them. I worry I mean don't sleep over my oldest many nights. He scares the crap out of me. I think back to all the things I was doing in high school that my parents would have probably bet the farm I wasn't. Things are even worst now with Facebook, instagram, twitter, and something I just found out about called snap gram. It's too much to monitor. I feel overwhelmed for sure. I often think I wish my kids could flash to their 40 year old life and look at the stupid shit their going to do in their teen years. I wish that they knew it's better to be a leader than a follower! I think kids don't know where the line is with all this on line crap. It's so much easier to say something when your not face to face. I would have been one hot mess if this crap was available to me before I could handle it. I can be a hot mess on it sometimes and I'm in my forties! So Universe I'm asking again make my kids nerds. book worms, and straight A students who make all the right decisions.
2...I have asked the universe to turn my bad habits into good habits. It's not listening to that either. I often ask the Universe to let me wake up a different person. The one who loves to work out, eat right, the perfect mom, who has all the right answers, who brainwashes her kids to be perfect, the perfect wife, who likes to please her husband, doesn't get annoyed by him, the person that people say..."I want her life".
3...I have asked the Universe for unlimited funds....not listening. I want to have the kind of money that I can do great things with. Billionaire kind of money. I would be the greatest kind of person if I had unlimited money. I fantasize about this kind of money. I would do great things. I would take care of all my family. Surprising them with their houses paid off. I would give ungodly tips to service people and pick an un fortunate family to take care of. I think it would be great to give a family who had nothing everything...Damn it I'm supposed to be Ellen or Oprah.
4....I have asked to Universe for good health...not listening. Since getting diagnosed with MS it has been a torn in my side. I don't want to fear walking some day. That is something that most people take for granted. Me included. I hate to even think of it, I ignore it most days. That is until I can't feel one side of me. It becomes real to me then. I try to dance as much as I can fearing someday I will not be able to. .....Do you hear me Universe?????
5...I ask the Universe for happy and healthy children. So far the Universe has come through. Like I said before I worry about them all the time. It's funny because when I was younger I wondered if I would ever marry or have children. I married young. Now that I'm older I feel I married a little too young. We were so immature when we married. We were still growing up. My God Hubs was 24 and I was 25. We had no idea what it was to be married. We have had our share of growing pains for sure. We have had our share of ups and downs. Looks like we made it though...can't you hear Barry??? Sometimes I think in marriage you are up when your partner is down. It seems it's hard to be on the same page sometimes. My hope for my kids is they marry or date someone that has their back through the good, bad, and the ugly. Because that is what marriage truly is. It's Good, bad, and sometimes ugly. Growing up in the 80's ruined me. Anyone who grew up in the 80's remembers the 80's movie with the guy and the boom box. They also remember the hot guy who showed up to to wedding and had a perfect Bday cake for his girl. We are warped into thinking we will have a perfect 80's movie ending. Guys really don't do that shit in real life. I think it's bullshit. Damn you 80's movies you gave me an unrealistic view of how it should be. Now Hubs is paying for that!
6...I want my people to be around forever. Universe did not listen. All of my grandparents are gone. Grandparents should live forever. They are the version of your parents you wished you had. They love you unconditionally no matter how bad you mess up. You can do no wrong in their eyes. I miss all my Grandparents. My Mom's dad died right before she got pregnant with me. I feel sad that I never got to know him. I feel I got cheated. I can't imagine how my mom feels. When I had my kids I was so excited for the Grandparents to meet them. My Moms died shorty after I had Blake. He doesn't remember her and that makes me sad. What I remember about her is playing card games, going through her basement, and her drawers. She had the best jewelry and shoes. She lost her mind in the end. I fear that. I would hate to not recognize my people. My Dads dad was a card as the old people used to say in the olden days. He was funny as shit. He was around for the birth of all my kids. My Grandma who was around the longest was my dads mom. she crazy loved her family. When she died it crushed me. Mostly because I never saw anyones eyes light up the way hers did when we walked in a room. I spent lots of time with her as a kid. Gosh I miss her. She happened to be one of the most perfect things in my life. I miss her so much. I wish she was still here. She died on Thanksgiving. I will never forget that. Thanksgiving for me has become thankful for her. I'm so glad that my kids were old enough to remember what a great lady she was. Gosh writing this makes me sad...
Anyway, I'm still asking the Universe...ya know ask and you will receive........
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