Wednesday, September 4, 2013

16 years has gone by way too fast.

It's been a while since I've been here! Life got in the way.....not to mention brain fog. My oldest turns 16 tomorrow. 16....I have to say it over and over to believe it. How can I have a 16 year old????? I feel I still act like a 16 year old at times. Woe is me! I have that damn Peter Pan complex. So I sit here tonight....wanting to watch Duck Dynasty or Housewives. Anything but write in this stupid blog.  Tomorrow is a big day though....I'm going to have a 16 year old. Which to me means a person I birthed that can drive!!!!!!!!! When you take them to kinder for the first time and cry your eyes out. Not knowing if it's tears of joy or sorrow.  After you get through all those night feedings and the nasty toddler years this shit goes lighting fast! Don't blink. What's on my mind tonight as I wish I could go back to that night 16 years ago and start this crap over! Seriously people! I was all of 27 when this one came along. I thought I was old as shit at the time. Young and dumb for sure. I would do such a better job if I had a do over! I'm so much smarter now. At least that's what I tell myself!

 If I could reverse I would be laying in bed about now. Still smelling the dinner....it would be making me sick. Almost like it was coming under the door to mess with me. I was scared to death about giving birth. For a good reason...as I know now. Waiting for Hubs to get home from the worst job he ever had. Reading "What to expect when your expecting". Hubs would get home. I would tell him all the signs of labor I was reading about. Not knowing this guy was ready to see the world a little early. Which in his later years he's still waiting to see the world too early. Woe is me...did I say that???? At about six am I started to get craps like I had to poop. No poop was coming out though. I woke Hubs up who was going on no sleep. He told me I was crazy and I just had to poop. I will never let him live this down. This one was by far my hardest birth. Still the most pain I ever felt in my life.

Anyway I read this person's blog recently. She was talking about kids. She was talking about how they are like dogs in their early years. Ya know happy to see you, want to be with you, tails wagging for you all the time. Then they turn into cats. Arrogant, stand off ish, only come down for food, and are down right nasty. Boy was she spot on. She says they eventually turn back into dogs. I sure hope so. I'm not a cat lover!!!! So I have this cat 16 years later. Sometimes this cat shows signs of being a dog when he not asking for money, food, or a ride. But for the most part we live in the same house but have almost become roommates. Roommates that fight all the time. It makes me sad in way. This kid used to think I hung the moon He used to cry in preschool because he hated when I went away.  Now he thinks almost everything I say is stupid. I'd almost like to refer to him as a cat/dog....cat being first! Woe is me....yep I said it again!!!!!

So he has a girlfriend. Same girl he's been in love with since the 6th grade. This is super hard for a mom who still thinks she has a dog! What I love about this is he is loyal, like a dog. See there's a sign of dog in there. Who didn't want a loyal guy in high school???? And yes Hubs and I, taught him this!!!!!! He did hear a little of what we said! So he tells me they will go to college together and then get married. Yes, there are those few rare that make it. But it's a damn lottery. I like the girlfriend. He shows signs of the dog when he's with her. I was always nervous about my boys dating. Thinking I would never like who they picked. I'm happy he has good taste.  I'm super proud of him for being such a good boyfriend at such a young age. When I was his age my Dad used to joke that I could have a boy for the month. I was always changing boyfriends. Never satisfied at that age. Thank you Jesus I've taught my kids better.

Don't feel too bad for me. I still have two dogs in the house. That swear they will never turn into cats. I have one that's about to turn into a cat before my eyes! Don't blink. Did I say that??? Those dogs think this cat I have is the bees knees. Bee's knees is a saying right???? Not sure if that sounds right! Ya know what I mean though. Hopefully I won't eventually have three cats at once. If this happens I may leave! Every other weekend would sound great.

Anywho, I'm rambling! What I want to say about my my oldest. Who I still think of as child. He is turning into a man before my eyes. I never imagined that someday this perfect child that scrunched his forehead  when he took a bottle. That face is forever in my head. When he was little he was perfect in every way.  I remember thinking "everything is going to be alright because I have this perfect child". Boy was I wrong....because no one has a perfect child!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But truth be told I wouldn't trade this not so perfect child for a billion dollars! So happy birthday to my not so charming prince! I love you to the moon and back!

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