Hello Universe, it's me and I'm not going to take it!

I am Kerry...aka...The Queen of Halloween. Every year I have the best decorated house in the hood. This year I have zero motivation to get this shitz out. I wish someone would invent a happy, motivating pill for me. I would love to go to bed and wake up and everything is done for me. I think back to my childhood to that story of the shoe maker when he went to bed all the shoes were made by elf's for him! Easy way out I know, in true life there are no elves to make this happen. So in my true Halloween character I get this shitz out, mostly because these people I live won't get off my ass.

The two little guys love setting all this up. Blake not so much. Last year I set up the yard in my witch hat. Blake's bus comes right past our house. I was setting up in the witch hat when the bus went by. Now the kids and the bus driver love my yard and she throws me a thumbs up while driving by. Blake is coming down the street and comes up to me and says....Mom did you really have to be out her in your witch hat???....It's soooo embarrassing. I tell him I'm your Mom and I take pride in embarrassing you! If I were a kid I would think it was cool to have the best Halloween yard. I don't know what his problem is.

Even though the little guys love to help, they have no idea how to set this stuff up so it looks good. I let them do what they want and then I go behind them and change it! I am the queen, not them.

I surprise the kids and pick up some pumpkin's at HEB. Of course they want to cut right into them even though they will be rotten by Halloween if we do that.

Being the queen of Halloween, I can't wait either. We could always get more. HEB sells them for only four bucks. I learned quickly don't buy pumpkins at the patch they are way cheaper at the local grocery store.

Cole of course wants the love of his life to come over and help him. I'm really pulling for them even if they are nine since I love her parents. We would make great in laws.

Aidan wants a knife hanging out of his pumpkins head. I see therapy in his future.

He tried and he failed, miserably! Last year my twisted sister did some crazy ass pumpkins from a kit that had a sun and wolves. Cole remembered this and was trying to copy it. I think it looks like a pumpkin that got shot in the head.

What can I say A for effort????? Not really but don't tell Cole that.

Blake comes home and wants to carve his pumpkin. I am really pumpkined out at this point. I just want to watch modern family and be left alone. He carves it on his own, he did a great job. I ask him for a picture. He does NOT want to take one. I tell him I have a picture every year of his life with his pumpkin. He tells me he will take one but he does not want me to put it on facebook. I agree but don't agree not to put it on the blog. Now they really don't exactly know about the blog this is for them when they are age appropriate with their own kids.

Hubby comes home from work and I ask him to help me with the final touches to the yard. The wiring that is, I can't wire all this crap without blowing a fuse. He tells me the shower door is not working right and he is going to fix that first. He spends a lot of time cleaning the crap out of it in the garage because he is a very anal clean freak. I'm on the computer in the front of the house since Blakey baby fried my lap top last week. Hubby comes in and says's...I can use your help. I ask him with what???? He tells me to come in the bathroom. I tell him let me finish up on here. I also ask him to tell me what he needs help with. He tells me just come in the bathroom when I am done. I take me time and then I start washing a window to hang a Halloween decoration. While I am washing I hear this noise coming from the bathroom that I can't make out. I go in there to find Hubby cleaning up a huge mess of glass everywhere. WTH, UNIVERSE we are at way more than three things going wrong! Hubby just looks at me and laughs. I'm not really laughing at this point. I have not asked the UNIVERSE what's next lately. I think the universe and me are at odds for some reason. I have to run to Drippin to pick up Blake so I get out of cleanup thank God.

My friend Ashley is coming by to pick up Cole's love. I call her from the car and tell her when she picks up Brooke to go in my bathroom. She knows all the crap that has gone wrong lately. She calls me and says......You need to get to church quick. YOU THINK???? I don't know who I pissed off but for God sakes UNIVERSE pick on someone else! I get back home just in time for Hubby to have cleaned it all up!

Earlier today I had a follow up phone call from Berkley heart center. Now I had this crazy test since my Dad....aka....Grumpa had a heart attack and my Aunt....ake...Debbie Downers, downer sister had one at 39. It's crazy what they can see from this test. I recommend it whole heartily! The lady on the phone tells me my body does not digest fat well. This is a gene I got from Grumpa or Debbie. Now damn I am thinking to myself this is bullshit. I want that gene that my Mom seems to carry for perfect skin. She in her hay day sunned like a rock star and smoked like a champ. She is in her sixies now and has less crows feet that I have! She doesn't have a wrinkle on her forhead, is it so much to ask to inherate that gene??? Universe are you listening??? I need to go on a very low fat diet even the good fats. As I am talking to her I am making a super high in fat dinner. She also tells me alcohol is a devil for me it will increase my cholesterol and blood pressure. Hello women I am Irish catholic we drink beer! I need a tottie now and then to get through the day of living with these people. I LOVE fat foods! I don't have a sweet tooth but I defiantly have a fat one. I am telling the women all this and she does not seem to get my humor in it! This news to me is not fun! I hate getting old and having to manage health crap! I really love the "ignorance is bliss" thing. I'm writing this blog on a night when I don't normally have a beer but I want one because this lady said I can't have one! I also have that bad habit of wanting things I am told I can't have. I don't know if it's because I want to prove I can or what! BULLSHIT I say! Hey UNIVERSE what I want from you is happines, good health, super wealth, and great genes! DO YOU HEAR ME?????