What's not believable about a life size Bunny going from house to house????

When I was a young mom I couldn't wait to be Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny. I couldn't wait to see my kids sweet innocent smiles when they discovered the things left for them. I couldn't wait to do all the traditions that came along with these holidays. The baking cookies, decorating the tree with holiday music, making gingerbread houses, coloring eggs, and hunting for eggs. I never imagined that these times would also come along with huge messes, a cluster fuck of ornaments in the same spot of the tree, kids sick during holidays, fighting over what the other one got, tears, ugly eggs since I have boys, and WTF moments in my head! Don't get me wrong these days were also filled with lots of love, smiles, laughs, and my greatest memories. Well those days have come to an end lighting fast for me. This is the first year that the last of these people I live with questioned the reality of the giant bunny. What's not believable about a life size bunny going door to door dropping off baskets????? Aidan is an over thinker for sure. Every time I came up with a reason the bunny was real. He came up with a really good reason why I was full of shit. This is once again why I think we should age in reverse. Kids are in such a hurry to grow up and figure the world out. What I would give to re-live the days where I believed in Santa and the bunny. Life was so easy back then. What I would give to be 21 again but that would be another blog that I probably shouldn't write about.

Now that the kids know I'm the bunny they really ruined Easter for me. Not the religious side of Easter. They spent the days before Easter asking when I was going shopping for their Easter stuff. I have always gotten them a gift with their baskets too. Big mistake....all you young mom's out there keep it simple. Keep it to candy. If you don't you will find yourself with spoiled rotten kids years later. You will wonder where you went wrong. For some reason my kids were requesting things that are only birthday or Christmas worthy. I tell them I'm picking the gift and it's going to be something reasonable.

Aidan wants a two hundred dollar bat. The fact that something as bad as.....Are you smoking something funny almost flew out of my mouth makes me feel guilty. If it were up to Hub's he would cut the baskets off all together since they don't believe. I'm a weak sentimental sucker. Aidan gets a wiffle ball bat not a two hundred dollar one. He actually has the nerve to complain about it. I tell him he is lucky he got anything. I tell him there are less fortunate kids who's parents don't have the money to do anything in the world. This doesn't even seem to faze him. He is living in his own little "I'm a spoiled ass" bubble. Oh and wait guess who put him there.....That would be me! I'm serious to the young moms out there. Don't be that overachiever during the holidays. I'm here to tell you it will bite you in the ass.

Blake is the lucky one of the three stooges. Since he is the oldest he will enjoy Santa and the bunny for years longer than the younger ones. He looks happy right????? I believe this is how most teenagers look. The word that comes to mind is stone cold! Too cool to smile for a picture or act happy about an ass load of candy plus a game. I'm so glad I gave up a great new outfit or a new pair of boots for these guys! When I was a kid my mom used to fill my basket with expensive Fannie May chocolate. I always really wanted the cheap candy. Peeps, Reese's, robins eggs, and the giant cheap chocolate bunny. Damn what I would give now for a basket full of Fannie May....just another reason we should age in reverse.

The kids never brought up coloring eggs or hunting eggs this year. It is sad to me. It's sad when you realize all the stuff you used to feel bothered with at times is over. My mother in law and sister in law were supposed to stay through Easter. I planned a good meal. Their trip got cut short because my sister in law could not get out of work. So here I found myself with nothing to do on Easter. My kids do not appreciate a good meal most of the time. I did cook something while the in-laws were here that they all seemed to love. Those meals are few and far between. Remember I grew up Irish Catholic, Easter is a big deal. With Easter came big family parties. Another thing I wish I could get a do over on. That saying "you don't know what you got till it's gone" rings so true. My family in Chicago were all getting together for their traditional Easter bash. These are the times I really miss being home. My friend Ashley called and ended up inviting us over. Since I had already got some stuff to cook for Easter I said I would make it and bring it over.

While I'm getting myself and my food ready to go over there I get a call from Ashley. I can hardly understand her. She is crying but I can't tell what she is saying. I finally make it out. They had gone to church when they came back her husband had accidentally ran over their dog. It was a little chihuahua. They were all so sad. They are huge animal lovers.  I ask if we should not come. She tells me they really want us to come anyway. I kind of feel bad going over there. We stop at Walgreen's on the way over. Since this dog was kind of her daughters I stop in to get her gum, candy, lip gloss, and nail polish. I know this will not make her any less sad but I want to give her a little something special so she knows we are thinking about her. So we get out there and the mood is little somber. There are some swollen eyes. I feel so bad for all of them. It's a sucky thing to lose a pet. I can't help but think it's Easter they did the right thing went to church and all. Then that happens. It just makes no sense to me. Sometimes I struggle with the way God works. I can only go back to my faith that there is a reason why we experience everything good or bad. We have to trust that this is what's supposed to happen to us even it is impossible to understand.

The day ends up being as good as it can be. We all make the most of it. This happens to be one of my all time favorite pictures. I love how guys are so different than women. They don't worry about how they look. We as women are raised to be prim and proper. We worry too much about what we look like or what people think. I love this picture of Boogie living life to the fullest. I might be slightly jealous. The sad thing is no one judges a dude for having a little extra belly....don't get me wrong Boogie is in good shape for his age but he isn't sporting no six pack. Does  he care...of course, but not enough to let it stop him.

Alright so here is my child who can rock any look as if he is a star. Not afraid to rock a light blue girls cowboy hat, not afraid to sing a Taylor Swift song out loud, not afraid to put on lipstick for a good laugh, and not afraid to sing naked in front of a mirror. He will kill me for this later but I kind of love this about him. This kid has given me some of my best belly laughs over the years. I see big things in his future. This kid also reminds my of that "YouTube" video "the annoying orange" at times. If you never saw the annoying orange YouTube it. You will get what I'm talking about. He has been standing in front of me talking before. I can't seem to get the picture of the annoying orange image over his face out of my head. He has a bad tendency to repeat himself over and over when I don't want to hear what he is saying. So I sit back an imagine him as the annoying orange hoping it will make light of the situation. Hoping I don't fly completely off the deep end on him. It works sometimes.....but other times I just lose my mind.

Aidan is a crazy dog lover. Dogs love him as well. I see him later in life married with a shit load of dogs. I see him as a builder of some kind or an engineer. No paper or tape is safe in my house. He is always building boats, football fields, baseball fields, and pole vaulting things out of paper. Recently when Hub's took him to six flags he did not want to get on the roller coasters. I asked him why later. He told me while he was in line he was looking at the way it was made. He told me he saw the wood shaking. He said if one piece of that wood snapped the people would come crashing down. I told you he was my over thinker. It makes me sad for him. I think he will miss out on a lot thinking this way. I know I do. Now I don't really think he has to worry about six flags.....it is the carnivals I worry about. I over think the toothless almost homeless looking people that are not only putting together those rides but running them. I kind of sound like a judgmental B right now. Not proud!

As the day goes on the kids are trying to dive into the inner tube. It is fun to watch.

Everyone has a shot at it. Cole seems to make it every time. The kids say he is lucky. Boogie and I say he has skills.

Ashley who is no side of the road shopper got this pinata on the side of the rode. Kind of proud of her about now. She is normally a Nordstrom girl. The kids have a blast with it.

We topped off the day with a game of family baseball. These are my pretty toes sitting poolside not wanting to mess up my makeup or show off any muffin top. Watching from the sidelines taking pictures of people living life.


Once again I can't help but think what I would live my life like in reverse. Would I care so much about muffin top???? Or would I strip down and jump in that pool???? Would I care so much what people thought????? Would the small things that upset me mean so much???? Would it bother me so much when my kids annoyed the shit out me???? Would all the material things matter so much.....would the he said she said things bother me???  Would I think I was fat at 25????? Would that guy that didn't like me in high school bother me so much?????? Would I hug my kids everyday???   Would I enjoy like hell all the family parties I didn't want to attend as a teenager???? Would I listen to my parents because they really did know what they were talking about most of the time! Would I love my husband a little more, my kids, my friends?????? Would I love life more????? Of course I would...this is why we should age in reverse. Or at least act like we are. God I sound like such a sappy asshole....it is so unlike me!!!! Maybe it's because it's Friday the 13th. Five years ago I lost a very dear friend in a tragic accident. It's the first time the dates lined up the same since then. Just has me thinking about life! R.I.P. Kevin.

Living in my "Pinterest" world

While at work today I was a little bored. Not much going on there on a Thursday. So I find myself between Pinterest, facebook, e-mails, camera blogs, and mommy blogs. Oh yes and I'm talking on the phone in between all this!!!! I swear one of those mommy bloggers is copying me. I couldn't believe the similarities in the words she used. Starting with the name of her blog. I am just kidding but it was strange reading her stuff, she even refers to her Husband as Hub's!!!! How dare she!!!! Who does that besides me????  Can you  feel the sarcasm?? I'm pretty much doing this all at the same time. I can't stay focused on one thing at a time. So I'm back and forth to all these web pages that are all pulled up at the bottom of my computer. At one point I think to myself that "What the What" saying! I'm only taking in bits and pieces of things....no wonder I'm having a hard time mastering the functions of my camera. I CAN'T CONCENTRATE OR FOCUS........I'm A.D.D.!!!!! When my kids act A.D.D. I get frustrated and pissed off. Hello! I have no one to blame but myself. Is there a pill I can take as an adult for this???? I hate pills though!!!! It is so frustrating to be this way!!!!

My brain reminds me of one of those God awful carnival rides that give you vertigo.Ya know the kind that whips you from side to side, back and forth, and upside down to right side up, all at the same time?All you want to do is scream.....STOP!!!!!  I'm exhausted thinking about it. No wonder I can't sleep at night. So after fantasizing about cooking in my one of my thirty Pinterest kitchens, I click over to e-mail. Never fails there is always a good mom...aka...Debbie Downer email. She does send some really funny ones but there is always a Debbie one slipped  in the mix. The one today was disguised to be a not so Debbie one. It's headline was......."EAT FRUIT-most interesting". I thought it was going to talk about the benefits of eating fruit. Boy was I wrong. It starts off in capital letters reading.......DON'T EAT FRUIT AFTER A MEAL!!!!!!.....Only eat fruit on an empty stomach!!!!! Can't you just hear the dunnnnn, dunnnn, dunnn,.......sound as you read that! It goes on to read that if you eat say a piece of bread followed by a piece of fruit. The fruit does not go straight through you like it is supposed to. Nice way of saying you do not shit it right out. The whole meal starts to rot and ferment in your intestines and then turns into acid. I have an overactive very visual imagination. I always have, which is one reason I'm in need of some good therapy. So I'm visualizing a piece of fruit rotting in my intestinal track with maggots all over it!!! See why I need a therapist?....It just ain't right!

It goes on to read that fruit mixed with putrefying other food produces gas......I have been a little gassy lately. BTW, I have no earthly idea what the hell the word "putrefying" means.....I'm just copying what the email says. I will be "googling" it later. Hence after the fruit mixed with putrefying other foods....your body starts to bloat. Oh, that explains a lot. It's not the fact that I have fallen right back off the workout wagon. I can totally blame it on eating fruit after food. I'll look at my friends and say.....ya see this extra tummy????? That would be fruit rotting and fermenting in my gut!!! Can you imagine the looks I would get. I wonder how someone would respond to that. It also causes gray hair.....I have been totally blaming those on my kids!!!! Who knew it was rotten gut fruit! It also causes baldness.....I think Hub's has been sneaking in a little fruit action after a meal. Also causes nervous outburst.....I really do laugh out loud when I read this one. Cole....aka....Drama Queen  eats an apple a day, I have a strange feeling it is not on an empty stomach. Just a guess!!!! Last it causes dark under eye circles....Damn I was blaming that on the beer. Then it says....All this will NOT happen if you eat fruit on an empty stomach.

Last the email talks about how you should only drink fresh fruit juices.....I know a good brand..."Genesis Today". Never heat your juice. I was trying to think if I ever drank heated juice. I don't think so. It says...Don't eat cooked fruit. Say good bye to hot apple pie. Unless you plan to use it like the guy in American Pie. I'm a poet and I didn't know it!!!! LOL, alright not that funny. Says to drink your juice slow. To let it mix with your saliva. It talks about how it is beneficial to go on a three day fruit-fast. It will cleanse the system and your friends will be surprised at how radiant you look. I wonder if it will give you the same radiant look I hear botox and fillers give you. All this is said to have been scientifically proven by Dr. Herbert Shelton. I do truly believe that raw fruits, veggies, and seeds are very beneficial to the body but I'm no Doctor. Even if I poked a little fun at the Debbie email.

After all this food for thought I click right back over to my Pinterest boards. For some reason I'm steering clear of the food board. I think I will check out my exercise boards. I look at all the hot bodies I will never look like. I love the one that says, one week to a rock hard butt.....Bullshit, it's going to take a lot more time than a week to get a butt like the girl that is pinned. I'd like to pin her all right. Pin her ass to a wall and force feed her cheeseburgers.. Can you feel my green eyed monster surfacing???? They say to replace your bad habits with good ones. Like a fruit instead of a cheeseburger. God forbid you ever eat a fruit after a cheeseburger. I think McDonald's got that whole apples and cheeseburger thing wrong. Exercise instead of a cocktail. Can't we just jog to the fridge for a beer and jog to the bathroom after. Maybe jog in place while drink it?????? I really do have good intentions when I pin the exercise stuff. I mean to do it but facebook, Pinterest, emails, shit TV, and Oh yes these people I live with get in the way! It is never my fault of course. Everyone and everything else's fault. As I write this one word comes to mind..... Blake...aka...the know it all. I got an email from a teacher that said he had not turned in some stuff. I took a break around the time he was getting off the bus. I tell him about the email. He says...Oh yeah I know but I turned that in today. As he is saying this I'm saying it to myself in my head. I knew that is what he was going to say word for word. It's safe to say I have heard that one before. He really should come up with a different story. Universe where are those perfect kids I have been asking for???????

I go back to work to have a Pinterest party. I check out all the party ideas that I will never do that I have spent precious time pinning. I imagine myself on the little tree stump stools with the pretty cloth seats. Lights hanging all in the trees and colorful overachievers cupcakes surrounding me. Oh yes and my perfect Pinterest cocktails in ball jars sitting in the cocktail canoe next to me. Bliss!!!! It is a nice thought to be living in your Pinterest world. After this I go back to Facebook. I want to see if anyone has posted anything interesting. Not so much. Facebook is pretty boring lately. Thank God there is not a barf, boring, REALLY, gay, TMI, get a life, or an OH no you didn't button. I bet I would have gotten everyone of those a time or two. So back to Pinterest I got my hair done yesterday. I had pinned a few colors I was going to try. I came back with the same old hair color. I'm a risk taker I tell ya. I did not take a shower today because I didn't want to ruin my perfectly done hair. It will not look like this for at least seven more weeks. That is when my next appointment is! Work is finally coming to an end. No time for Pinterest recipes I will never cook. That's alright after the rotting fruit in my gut visual today. Thank you, Debbie!!!! I think I may need to "Snopes" this fruit shit!!!!

On my way home Debbie calls. My Sister...aka...Twisty totally threw me under the bus. I was slightly poking fun at Debbie with her. I had a good story. I told her not to tell her. That was last night!!!!! I guess she forgot. After I'm on the phone with Debbie for a while complaining about my kids. She says....."I was reading the obituaries the other day, you know how I do that". Um yes, I know how you do it!!!!! Weird right?????? She happened to recognize two of the names. They were the brothers of people she knew. Why is it that older people like to talk about people they know or don't even really know that died????? After we talk about the dead people Debbie reads about stories. I tell her how Aidan....aka....the worry wort broke my garage window. He walks in and says......"I just happen to notice someone broke the garage window". Oh you just happened to notice huh???? Because that shit eating smirk on your face isn't giving you away at all!!!!!! Aidan is the easiest one to read of all these people. I tell him if I check the secret camera's and find out he is a liar he will be in big ass trouble. I tell him there is nothing worst than a liar. He tells the truth and yes I still have them snowed into believing the world they live in is filled with secret cameras! It's alright to call me an evil genius. I kind of like it! Last but not least. Blake called me shortly after I got back to work. He was calling to report the broken window. I love how all these people want to be the bearer of bad news when they are not the guilty one! Sorry again for bad grammar and run-on sentences! If you need me I will be pinning my Pinterest dream pool and imagining my perfect Pinterest body swimming in it! Happy pinning everyone!

The In-laws come in for a visit

 My in-laws came to town this weekend. A lot of people call their in-laws the out laws. I'm lucky that I have such a good relationship with mine.  When I started dating Michael I was in my early twenties. I'm in my early forties now. We have almost been married half my life. I'm here to tell you that is not easy for anyone. I have said before in this blog remember what attracted you to the person you love in first place because marriage is not easy and not for the weak. This also means I have been with these in laws half my life. They have become as close to blood as one could hope. We had a bond right away. I think they thought  I was good for Michael. He was a bit of a bad boy when I met him. It took a lot of years to completely turn him but I think we are finally there. That or he is just too tired and old to be bad now. I have always had strong family values. I was a girl in Texas away from her close nit family. They were a close nit family that took me in right from the start. I missed my family and all the family parties and holidays spent together. These people filled that void for me. They took me in no questions asked and treated me like family. Of course we have had our ups and downs as any family would. We have all talked shit about each other a time or two but that is life. Bottom line is we all love and respect each other. Talking shit is a part of life. We talk shit about our kids, our family. our in laws, our spouses, and our friends. It does not mean we love them an less. Thank God our thoughts can not be heard. Think about it. I think most of us can say we are total shit takers. Sometimes it's because we are worried but sometimes it's just to judge and make ourselves feel better about ourselves, I swear people strive on drama...but that is just my opinion.

 Anyway, we headed to the bluebonnets, to take pictures with Mimi. What I love about my relationship with Mimi is we can talk honest with each other. I can tell her what bothers me about her son or her grand kids. She can relate being married for several years and raising four kids. She does not judge me on my frustrations with them. She will tell me if she agrees or disagrees. I can tell her if I think a movie star is hot and if ever given the opportunity I would rock their world. We kind of have the same taste in men. Like Taye Diggs.....God help the first one of us that gets him in a dark alley.  I say if I ever go down I'm going down in flames. Which means it is safe to say I'm never going down since Taye is not roaming around Drip.

 Michael probably had one of the greatest Fathers in the world. I do too. Our Fathers were fast fiends they got along great. Michael's dad's life was cut short. He died when my kids were pretty young. He was one of the most amazing guys I ever had met. We clicked right from the start. He is one of my all time favorite people I ever met.
Maybe it is because he loved me so much.  I can't put into words what an amazing man he was. I have great memories of him.  I sat with him a few times when he knew he was dying and everyone else was at work. It is a strange thing to sit with someone when they know. They tell you all kinds of things. Regrets, what they would do over, and most of all what they want people to know and remember. The biggest thing for him which he told me over and over is that he did not want the kids to forget him and remember what they meant to him. I know good and well that Blake remembers everything about him. The other two I have to remind and tell them stories. They were really young when he died. I think one of the things I remember is when I was pregnant with number three. I was not at all happy. We will just call him baby bud light. He would call me on his way home from work because he knew how I felt. He would check to make sure I was alright and ask if I needed anything. Truth be told at that time if I had to be pregnant....I wanted a girl. I dreamed of pink. He knew this and assured me this was my girl. Boy was he wrong, no pun intended. My parents and Michael's parents were in the room for the ultrasound when I found out it was another boy. I think my first reaction in my head was.....Another fricken boy are you kidding me. This was for sure my last shot of a world filled with pink shit. So what if I dress him in pink and put bows in his hair when no one is around!!!! Quit judging! I took it in an excepted it. Michael's younger brother and my younger sister had girls right out of the gate. I'm not bitter at all. Now that I have Aidan I wouldn't change one thing. Anyway, I sure do miss Michael's dad. I wish he was here to see all the things the kids are doing. Maybe once in a while I wish he was here to throw a little whoop ass on them. I know one thing, he would be really proud of them. It makes me sad I feel that they got cheated not being able to have him longer.

The boys crazy love having a camera in their face constantly. Sometimes they start to act up. They kind of act like complete and total jack asses. See here this would be Blake farting in Aidan's face. Cole is making that WTF motion.

I think this should be my Christmas card! I'll show the little smart asses. Does anyone get why I love a cold beer yet????

They don't get it if they would just cooperate things would go way faster.

While going through my pictures I came across this one. See the butterfly next to Blake's head??? Pretty cool.

My sister in law came too. When I started dating Michael she was a year older than what Blake is now. Scary thought! My how time flies. See that little shit ass grin on Aidan's face????? He is putting a bluebonnet between his legs as if it's his #@$%#!!!!!! Really?????? I have know idea where he gets his sick sense of humor. The things I put up with. I had lots of fun catching up with Lindsey. Both nights we stayed up way too late solving the worlds problems. The weekend went fast.

I feel like I haven't seen my friends, my core group forever. I feel bad. I feel like I have been a bad friend lately. Truth is I have just been busy as shit!!!!!! With these people I live with of course. All the practices and the games there is no time for me. One of my friends just started blogging!!!!! Good for her. Blogging is such therapy, it is a way to get all the bad shit out of your head! It is also a way to put all your bad shit out in the Internet world for people to judge. It is also a way to say....Hey I'm still here not so invisible as I feel at times. When your a "blogger" it is smart to write things down that you want to blog about. I can't tell you how many times I think of something great to say and can't remember it for the life of me even though I made a conscious effort not to forget it. I'm up late once again can't stop watching shit TV. I have a hair appointment in the am. I really want to reinvent myself and go red or brown. I bet I still come back a blonde. I have been a blonde most of my life besides the awful dish wash stage in my awkward years in middle school. Btw, what happened to the awkward stage???? I really don't see kids these days hitting that stage. I wait for it because sometimes it makes me smile to see other people go through the bad shit I did. I went on a little trip down memory lane recently. I thought maybe I wasn't as awkward as I felt. Yep sure was!!! There is no sugar coating those years. Wish I had one of the celebrity stylist in my pocket who would tell my what hair to have, what makeup to wear, and what not to wear. Oh wait, I have my sister...aka..Twisty for that!

I need a wife!

 So my Hub's and kids have been on me to sell our house and move on land. I have been trying to keep an open mind. There are good reasons to move. I found this house on line. It's amazing how pictures could make a house look bigger. I should know this since I dabble in photography. We get there and the house is really amazing. It has unbelievable views of the hill country especially from the third story porch. It is just too small for us. I truly love the house we live in. I never imagined that I would have a house this nice. Like I said there are good reasons to move.  We could get a nicer house and more land because interest rates are so low, taxes are cheaper, and utilities are cheaper in Drip. We have a crazy neighbor that really blames me for everything that has gone wrong for him here. He calls me the evil ring leader. He tells people to stay away from me because I'm trouble. I guess it is because I was the first one to fight with him. I guess he thinks I turned everyone against him here. At least this it what he tells everyone. Truth be told people don't like him because he is down right scary. He has crazy eyes.....he tells people to F off, he pushes old ladies to the ground...which he got arrested for, he pops balls that go over his fence, he barks at people, and he has made this really great neighborhood an awful place to live at times. He has put up nasty signs facing our house and even nailed my kids things that ended up on his property to fence. I guess that was to taunt my kids. Yet I'm to blame.


Anyway the Hub's and kids want to move and think it will be no big deal. Easy right???? Right for them. Who will get the house ready to show to the public...this staging thing is BS by the way. Oh yes, that is on me. Who will pack everything up, get rid of stuff we no longer need, and sell off stuff that is still worth a shit. Oh yes, me again. Who will clean up the house for showings and make all the beds and pick up the stuff left behind......Oh me again. This is all overwhelming to me. I really like my house. I'm always back and forth to Drip it would be easier in the long run. But we have a lot of shit to move! Last time was a company move. Those are nice everything is packed and moved for you. Plus they paid for it! I can't find a existing house in Drip that I can afford which means we will have to move  twice. The only way I would move is if we build. Thanks to pinterest I have big ideas I can not afford. Us girls kind of get the shit end of the stick when it comes to moving.  We have to do all the bullshit when it comes to moving......not to mention makeup and heals. One day I'm going to research who came up with makeup and heals. Maybe all us girls could get together and chuck our heals at that person. So the moving thing.....Does Hub's forget how much window treatments are and landscaping, plus moving cost????????? All this just makes me wish I had a wife!

 Friday I'm getting ready for work. Hub's calls and says he has been rear ended and his truck needs to go to the shop. I'm late for work after being tied up on the phone with him. I'm thinking I'm working by myself this day. It would be no big deal to be late. My new boss is there when I get there. Ya know what they say about first impressions....I blew it!

Later in the day I head home because I'm starving...I work in my neighborhood. I let the dog out and leave the back door wide open. Hub's and me have a standing fight over me leaving the doors open. Of course a bird flies in. Blake is home so I'm screaming for him to get this bird out. The bird is flying into every window in the house as I scream. Blake comes down with a bb gun ready to shoot. I'm a huge animal lover. Blake and I start to fight bad. I tell him to get a towel catch it and release it to the yard. He is determined to shoot it. We fight more as the bird is flying all around us. It's a crazy scene in my house while we are fighting, the bird is flying all over and crapping!!!


So tonight I'm getting ready for company. Hub's mom and sister are coming tomorrow. I can't wait to see them. I'm doing sheets at midnight and cleaning while hubs sleeps. Bitter???? Naaaaa, I love doing it all!!!! So wishing I was born the boy right now. They just do not care. Could you imagine not caring???? He would let the company come and sleep on dirty sheets. I could never do that. Wouldn't it be nice to be a boy??? Hub's is better than most he will help clean some of the time. He has been slacking lately though.

My kids are finally older where I can get back in the work force.....ten years ago I made real money. Now because of a ten year gap I can only find entry level work. Yes I have been out of the work force for a long time. I tell you the work force is way easier than raising and taking care of a family. You think I don't have experience multi tasking???? Getting people everywhere they need to be, breaking up fights, resolving problems, cleaning up messes, bullshitting my way out of any situation, and getting everything running on time. Keeping up with every one's shit and putting up with every one's shit!!!! Us stay at home moms have more experience than most guys out there. So I'm here to say I feel it is bullshit when we decide to go back to the work force we can't find anything worth while. I can do just about anything after this.

The heartbreak of defeat

 This track season my son Blake did amazing. Every meet he came in first or second for pole vaulting. He tied the school record from 26 years ago. He also came in first or second in all the 300 hurdles. We were all really excited for him to compete in the district track meet. I just knew he was going to break the school record and win for pole vaulting. He has always been an athletic kid but was never the star. In this he was "the one to watch". At every meet I could hear other parents and coaches talk about how good he was. I am so proud of him. What a great community we live in too. He has gotten a lot of support from the parents, coaches, and his classmates out here. I got a lot of text wishing him luck and a lot of text to see how he was doing. I could feel that people were really pulling for him to win. Even his classmates competing against him. I had planned the pictures I was going to send to the paper for when he won. I was going to even try and write an article. Of course I would have needed a ghost writer since we all know I write by the seat of my pants.

 So Tuesday afternoon I sprung the little ones from school early so we could head out to Marble Falls. I had to stop for gas. I ran in to get a few drinks. When I came out I found Cole with my lipstick on! What a character. We picked up four of Blake's friends who wanted to cheer the dripping kids at the track meet. Marble Falls is an hour drive from us. We were all really pumped up on our way out there. We played music and sang.

While they were warming up I over heard the kids from the other school talking about how Blake would be hard to beat. You know when your a Mom you can just tell when something is wrong with your kid. I got that feeling when I talked to him. He seemed especially nervous and not as confident as he was the other times. I tried to reassure him they he would do great.  Right away Blake was not getting his steps right. He didn't know why he couldn't get it right. I could feel his frustration and stood back hoping he could kick the nerves. He was getting visibly upset with his jumps. I walked over and told him to shake it off he would get it next time. His coach was trying his best to help him. They both had worked really hard preparing for this meet. He was out in the second round not making over 8 feet. He has been making over ten feet at every other meet. They get three tries for every foot they clear. On the third he made it over but his pole kicked back and knocked the bar over. I was standing on the sidelines watching as everything seemed to move in slow motion. I watched his face light up as he got over and then I watched it change as he realized his pole had knocked the bar over. I looked over and saw the reaction of his coach, the other parents, his teammates, and even his competitors. We all had the same shocked look on our faces. I was impressed that even the kids on the competing teams seemed to be sad for him instead of being happy he was out. Before he even hit the mat I saw him start to cry. He rolled off the mat and laid on the ground crying which felt like forever. I thought about not including this next picture in the blog. The one of him laying there crying. I'm writing most of this blog for my kids. I think this picture captures the heartbreak of defeat. I can't even find the words to write about how proud I am of him. Proud that he did so well in the season and proud that he cared this much. He is a great pole vaulter and I look forward to watching him just get better in High school.

I walked over to him lying there crying and told him it was going to be alright. He wouldn't pick his head up. Thank God I had sunglasses on because I too was crying. I sat there with him and could hear him crying under his hands. This really broke my heart for him. His coach walked over and told him to get up and hold his head high because he had a great season. He told him that everyone has a bad game even the pros's. He told him he would only get better and he would be there to help him. One of the Dad's watching walked over and told him this was the first time he had watched him vault. He said he must be something special by the reaction he saw from everyone when he didn't make it.   I heard him say this is just a bump in the rode son. I watched his teammates walk over to show their support and their disappointment. I think the thing that impressed me the most was the boy from Lake Travis that walked over. This was Blake's biggest competition. They have been neck and neck all season. They either tied or would beat each other. They both got over the ten foot mark at the last meet they were in together for the first time. This kid walked over to Blake and told him he was sorry he didn't make it. He said he was looking forward to competing against him. He told him that he came into this thinking Blake was going to beat him and just because he didn't make it didn't mean he was any less. Wow, right???? Kudos to the people who raised that boy. It just makes me happy that we live in such a terrific community.

I tell Blake don't worry you still have hurdles and you will be great. To make a sad story more sad last night in the pre-qualifications for tonight's track meet. They called Blake's name over the speaker as a competitor for the 300 hurdles. For some reason and we still have not got a real answer why. His name was not on the list to compete in that for district. He hears that and tells me this is the worst day of his life. I say...I know, it seems like it now but you are fine. I'm thinking in my head this is really nothing there are a lot worst things in life. Though I'm very disappointed too.

 We could go home but we hold our head up high and cheer the rest of the kids on. Everyone was so supportive of us, we need to do the same for them. My neighbor Ari rocks it out for the hurdles. Talk about "the one to watch" this girl is amazing. She placed first so proud of her. I love this picture. She is the one in the maroon that looks like her right arm is missing. This girl has had a great season and is just fun to watch. Congrats to her! As I was watching her another mom comes over to me. She says she was in the stands watching Blake. She saw him on the ground crying. She has watched and supported him all season. She tells me how she had tears in her eyes for him and wanted to come down and hug him. How great is that??? That is why I'm proud to be from Dripping Springs!

 Ashley another one of Blake's friends has a great season. So proud of her too! Another fun one to watch. I'm so glad we stayed.

 There is nothing like a Texas sunset at a sporting event.

Blake's best friend Ryan had a great night as well. So proud of him. This kid was Blake's very first friend when we moved here five years ago. They were fast friends and have been great friends to each other ever since then. Ya know when your older you recognize the difference in the friends your kids keep. There are the friends who you can see will be the ones that come and go. There are the ones you see your kid going through the long haul with. This is the kid that I see Blake as a man still being friends with him. I once overheard a conversation between them. Your shocked right???? They were talking about going to the same college together and after college being married and living by each other with their wives and kids. I couldn't ask for a better friend for Blake. I have seen him have his back in many situations. I have seen Blake has his back as well. I'm happy that he found such a good friend here. I love this kid too. He is like my other kid. He even named me as his second mom on Facebook. These two live down the street from each other and are back and forth between the two houses always. I saw the disappointment Ryan and his mother felt for Blake tonight. I hope they felt the joy we felt for Ryan tonight! I do have to say Blake is that kid who is going to do whatever his friends are doing good or bad. Ryan is that kid that is the voice of reason. This is one reason I'm glad he is Blake's best friend.

So the ride home was a little more quiet than the ride there. There was no music blaring and singing going on. Blake was still feeling down as was I. We stopped at WHAT A BURGER, super size my ass a little more. I blame sports for my super sized ass! Anyway, like I said before I am beyond proud of Blake this season. I'm proud of the community we come from. I thank everyone for all the support they have given him and the kind words. I can't wait to see what he does in high school and look forward to cheering him on. I'm sad that middle school has come to an end in what feels like a blink. I'm happy that Blake had an amazing coach, Jason Strilzuk, who  I can't say enough kind words about. This guy went to college on pole vaulting scholarship. How lucky are we that we have him coaching our kids. I only wish we could take him with us to high school. I got home tonight. I told him I will support you and get you training because I know your good. He trained for four weeks with someone that trains the UT collage kids plus he trained with his coach Jason Strilzuk. I asked Blake who did you learn more from because that is who we are going to have help you for high school. I'm all about a scholarship. He says hands down Jason Strilzuk. He learned the most from this coach. Thank you to an awesome coach!  Dripping Springs TX middle school came in first in district for seventh grade and second in district for eighth grade! Congrats Drippin! Once again I know I spell bad and have bad grammar, sorry! Too lazy to check.

What happened to lazy weekends????

 Sitting here thinking about what Saturdays used to be like. Staying up way too late on Fridays, sleeping in on Saturdays, and meeting friends for a late lunch. Not a care in the world. Of course those were the days before kids. No one tells you when you decide to grace the world with your offspring that your lazy social life is over. So Friday night it was early to bed at least for the kids. Me being a night owl can never sleep before midnight! We woke up Saturday morning scrambling to get ready for two baseball games and what I thought was one flag football game. During Aidan's first baseball game I get a call from my teenager who likes to be left behind for anything screaming family these days. He says..."when are you going to be home"? I say....."it's going to be a while". He tells me his hand is bleeding everywhere and he has no idea why. I'm like..."what do you mean???? How can you not know why your hand is bleeding everywhere"????? He says..."It just is". I call my neighbor Erin in a panic. I tell her to go over and I will be on my way. She calls me as I'm driving home. She says...."it's no big deal he just scratched his hand must have hit a vessel and it won't stop bleeding". She wrapped it up for him and let her daughter and her daughters friend stay there in case he bled out before I got there. I get home and he has a pin size hole in his hand. I look at him and say.."Are you kidding me?". He pulls out his iPhone because he videoed the bleed. I have to admit what ever he scratched had a blood squirt and did bleed a lot for that pin sized thing. I tell him I have to go to Aidan's second game and he is coming with me. He goes complaining  all the way there. I tell him your brothers have sat through every sport you ever played cheering you on....you need to support them too. So he goes but text messages the whole time we are there. Kids going to be sad later in life when he realizes he has skipped right over his life because his head was always in a phone.

 After two baseball games we head home to get Cole ready for his flag football game. We get home and Blake and Aidan say they don't want to go. I say they can stay home. While I'm freshening up my rode hard and put away wet ass in my bathroom Cole comes in crying. He looks at me and says....."I go to every ones games and support them and cheer for them and now they don't want to go to my game". Aidan has been in the sun all day at this point. BTW, kid never played baseball before this year and just happens to be lead batter! His coach told me he is natural. Bragging right now of course. Kids an over thinker I have always said that. Baseball is a thinking sport. Not to mention after every game he comes home and pulls up youtube videos on baseball and watches them for hours. Back to Cole. I tell Cole Aidan has been in the sun all day and needs a break. I tell him that Blake and I will be at his game for sure. I walk out and ask Blake to see me in the bedroom. I explain to him that Cole is upset and he has to go support him at his game. He argues a little. I say..."I'm the one who does everything for you and your going to do this one thing for me...or I will cut you off...and you don't want that". So Blake, Cole, and I head to Cole's game. I drop Aidan off at a friends house because he is too young to stay home alone. At his age I walked a mile home from school by myself and let myself in my house till my parents got home from work. Oh, how times have changed! We are now in the day an age of helicopter parenting. I swear we are setting these people up for failure in their future.


We get to Cole's game and its hotter than hell. Blake lays on the field with his shirt off not watching a thing. I'm hot as shit but I pretend to be totally into the game watching my watch the whole time. He does amazing. I know this because the coach told me so. After the game I'm like hell yeah it's over! The coach tells me they play two games every Saturday. I feel my heart sink and I guess my face showed it because he says.."go home I'll take Cole after the game". It takes me one second to agree to this. I walk over to Cole and tell we are hot and the coach will take care of you...we are going to HEB and heading home. He is so sweet and says.."that is fine". Not before he makes a comment about Blake tanning himself through the whole game and not watching it. I can't argue it is what it is. Blake and I high tail it out of there to HEB the local grocery store. I go in for a few things and come out 150 dollars later.

 After HEB we drive around Drip because my kids and Hub's want to sell our house and move on land. I like to drive around looking for potential lots. We drive right behind the Middle school because we see a for sale sign. I have to laugh maybe because I'm from Chicago. We come across this house. It is a normal every day house except there are goats on the porch as if they are dogs. There are ponies and donkeys roaming around the front of the house! Only in Drip would you see something like this!


Later that day Cole's coach calls Hub's. He tells him the second game that no one was there to support him he did awesome. The coach said there was other coaches taking notice of Cole and asking who he was. Damn it if that isn't a fine example of lazy parenting! Well shit I live my life guilty and this is yet another thing to feel guilty about.

 So Sunday...Cole had a sleep over that aged me another year. Those boys stayed up way too late. Cutting into my beauty sleep, Then they got up way too early once again cutting into my beauty sleep. The boys and I mean all of mine wanted to head to the lake Sunday morning. I had just come off interrupted sleep. I wanted to stay home to do laundry, buy veggies for my veggie garden, watch shit TV, and cook an awesome dinner. So that's what I did. Let me tell you I have thoughts of turning this blog into a cooking one. Those people make money on their blogs. I was watching shit TV while doing laundry. I watched the Chew and came across a great recipe that I made while they were gone. So anyway if you have a family more than two you get two chickens. While cleaning them out I was a little disturbed that one was missing organs in it's cavity. Anyway you rub the chicken down with olive oil. That sounds a little dirty. You season it with salt, pepper, and red pepper inside and out. You place red potatoes and onions all around it. You shove lemons up it's ass. You get your favorite tomato  sauce and put it around it. You add white wine then you drink the rest of the bottle. You get a can of chopped tomatoes and throw it over the top. Top with fresh rosemary. You cook it at 375 for and hour and a half. I basted it about every 15 minutes. It was delish!

While the boys were at the lake I worked in my garden. Once again I just bought a bunch of stuff and randomly planted it everywhere. I hope something comes up!

My knock out roses are looking good! It's starting to feel like spring around here. Tonight we had the pre qualifier for the district track meet. I know Blake made it for pole vaulting. Tonight he was competing for the 300 hurtles as well. He came in first in his race and qualified for tomorrows race. I'm so proud of him. Say some prayers for him. I would love to see him take first in both. I really want him to beat that middle school pole vaulting record too.

I have a great Debbie Downer story. I nicknamed my mom Debbie Downer. She was not a big fan of that. I now refer to her as positive Patty. So she calls me the other night. She is telling me how her and my Dad....aka...Grumps went out for some appetizers the other night. They were sitting next to this couple. She is telling about all the things this couple and them had in common. Then she starts telling my how this women's sister was murdered and her brother died in a tragic  accident. She tells me they had such a great time talking with them I say...."So you had a great time talking about dead people". She starts to laugh cause she knows I am WAAAA, WAAAA, WAAAAing her in my head. I got a Debbie Downer E-mail from her the other day. Apparently if you water your organs by drinking a glass of water before bed you have a lesser chance of having a heart attack or stoke. I wonder if beer counts as watering????

I have been working out consistently now for six weeks. I workout at least four to five days a week. Every time I finish I lift my shirt to look at my stomach. For some reason I think that fat is going to disappear. I have still not lost one pound. Starting to get a little pissed here!

The mall police

While in Chicago last weekend we took my niece...aka..the Golden Jerk to see the Easter Bunny. She looked adorable. I loved it because my kids no longer believe. They would much rather play on their iPhones and Itouches than sit in the bunnies lap! I finally get that saying.."through the eyes of a child". When your in those moments stressed out as hell waiting for the day they are older and can take care of
themselves you don't realize how fast it is all going. I would give anything to have a do over. I would be a much better mom.

I have my camera with me at all times. I ask Ella to go over by the egg so I can get a picture. There is a sign that says no camera's past this point. We are not past this point yet but we are starting to get stink eye from the bunny workers. Ella knocks over the plant behind her. The bunny worker walks over to tell us she could get electrocuted. Really????? She's not sticking wet fingers into plugs! She simply knocked over a plant. I don't know about you but I never saw anyone get electrocuted period, especially while taking a picture or from knocking a plant over.

Ella gets up to the bunny. My Mom and Sister are buying an overpriced not so great picture of her. I go behind the NO cameras beyond this point sign to get a picture too. The crazy bunny worker walks over to me and tells me to put my camera away. I look at her and say......"My family just paid for the package to buy your pictures and I'm standing BEHIND the No camera line". She tells me to put the camera way! Not nice either! Now I can see if they weren't buying the overpriced package but they are. I argue again.....We bought a package besides the point that I'm at is way behind the No camera line. She walks away and gets on the phone. I had a feeling that she was calling the mall police..aka...Paul Blart.

So the mall cop...aka...Paul  comes over to me. He asks me if there is a problem. I say..."yeah my Mom and sister are buying a picture package and the crazy bunny lady is giving me a hard time about taking a picture from behind the .....No pictures beyond this point sign". He says..."you need to leave this area and put the camera away"! I argue more with him. I say.."I'm clearly behind the point so why are you guys giving me such a hard time". He says..."You can't point your camera anywhere near the bunny.....now put the camera away". I still want to argue my point but I'm going down stream at this point. I say alright and walk way! But really????? Hello...don't have that no camera's beyond this point if that is not the case! Have a sign that says No cameras period! The whole thing just rubbed me the wrong way! I have the urge to tell the bunny lady off but I'm way to mature to stoop to her level. Well not really but my mom is there and I don't want to make a scene. Plus the older you get the more you realize people like this would get off if you told them off rather than hear your point. I would totally be the topic of her wine induced conversation for months. Bitter???? Maybe!For God sakes I'm already super stressed out knowing I'm getting on a plane in a matter of hours!

We get back to house and Blake and my Dad...aka...Grumps are back from golfing. I take a few pictures of the twins before we head to the airport....which I can't help but think will be my last destination.

Ella crazy loves Blake! Maybe it is because she looks just like him. Maybe because she is already a typical girl that loves the one that pays the least amount of attention to her.

So I'm washing clothes and getting my stuff together. My dad..aka..Grumps makes a strange comment about the dogs face! I was sworn to put it in the vault, not to post it on Facebook or blog about it! It got a good laugh and a thought of WTF! See him here laughing!!!!! He knows he just said a WTF thing. So I'm trying to play it cool all the while wondering if this will be the last time I see my family since I crazy think a plane I'm getting on is going down. I have that felling of wanting to drink many beers or pop a Zanex (Sp?). We head out to airport. By the way Ella was supposed to come home with us. She couldn't because the flights coming back were bad....she would have been stuck with us a few more days! That would have been just awful...not for me...but for her dad. We made the mistake of telling her she was going home with us before we checked the flights. She was just as sad as me that she couldn't come.


My dad gets Blake and I off to the airport. I'm always a crazy weeping fool. There is something about being at home that just makes me feel complete. I love being there I feel safe and happy. I love my family and I love to be with them. I wish we could all live close.  I miss all the holidays with them and that makes me sad.


So we get to the airport and I get Garrets popcorn....I get some for me and some for my neighbors that helped with my little ones when I was gone. 30 dollars on popcorn makes my think...why didn't I come up with the crazy overpriced popcorn?????  You can always charge a good rate when you come up with something good. We get on the plane that I tapped three times hoping my dead relatives are not wanting a reunion. We were supposed to get first class but it got taken away right before we boarded.....due to upgrades. So we get the seats right behind first class. Blake and I are seated together next to a guy that's around my age. He is quiet at first. Then he realizes because of my conversation with Blake that I'm actually scared shitless. He starts to make small conversation with me telling me how much he flies. When your seated next to someone their right in your face when you talk. I could smell his dinner on his breath guessing he could smell mine too. I was thinking back to what I ate this day. Oh shit, I had a patty melt with onions for lunch. I try to talk away from him knowing I for sure have onion breath! Now I notice I can see every wrinkle and his pores look crazy big to me. I wonder what my pores and wrinkles look like to him. By the way, with all these thoughts I'm trying to not focus on crashing. I'm really not that shallow. He was super nice but there were so many times I wanted to puke from nerves! We landed safely......another two years from stress taken off my life for no good reason.


I get home only to come back to a messy house and lots of laundry. I love how anal hub's gives me a hard time about what I did when things are not in ship shape order in house and I come home to this. I wonder what they would do without me keeping their house and laundry in order! Not to mention all the shit they lose that only I can find. It's safe to say the house truly does need a Mama holding it together.


So I walked right back into the reality of my existence. Back to getting kids up and feed in the am. Back to awful car rides of kids fighting on the way to practices. Back to being the cook, the chauffeur, the voice, the one that keeps the house running! I headed out to Blake's track meet on Thursday. My new cars    GPS headed my out on a crazy back road route...it got me there though. This track meet was in Lake Canyon an hour in a half away from home.  Right away when I get there he tells me there is a crazy good vaulter that he can't beat. I tell him don't think about that...just do the best you can.  He ends up taking first for that region. He got over ten which again ties the record from 1986 but doesn't beat it. I really want him to beat it. He only has one more chance on Tuesday! Say a little prayer please. How great would that be. To beat a 26 year record???? I will keep you posted! To say I'm excited is an understatement.  I so want him to be the best at this, I think it will give him the confidence he needs. I think my kids are the best things ever...they are for sure the best things things I ever did. I just really want this for him...Do you hear Universe????


After the track meet I take five kids home. I have a new and improved car. We are in the parking lot and I type my address in the GPS. The GPS takes you on the shortest route. Well let me tell you the GPS took us down purgatory road. If anyone knows what purgatory means we were in it for at least an hour. The trees looked like they were going to swallow us. You couldn't see anything in front of you. I truly felt like we were right in the middle of a horror movie. We had random animals jumping in front of the car. The screams I was getting while driving was unbelievable and dramatic. Plus they had crazy rap music blaring in my car. STRESSFUL!!! I was trying to play it cool all the time thinking I was going to go into a full panic attack. All the sudden we come across this very narrow bridge with water running across it. I fear that we will get sucked up by the water...the kids yell we need to turn around. I don't want to tun around because we have already went so far on this path. The girl gets out of the car to see how bad the water is on this bridge. She gets back in and says it's not that bad. I go over it knowing if I go too far on one side the river will suck us in.....Did I say it was narrow????? Remember I have MS my shit ain't right anyway!  We make it over still trying not to hit the wild life. GPS tells me to turn left. I turn left a second to early, you can barely see in front of you on this road. We end up turning a second to early into a residence. A residence that kind of looks like the Texas chain saw movie, run down house, junk everywhere, bad cars with punched out windows, a dim light in the window. The kids all start to scream. I want to scream and panic too. I don't I back up and take the next left. We finally end up in Wimberly which I know.


We stop to get gas. I want to walk into the bathroom and scream at the top of my lungs to release the stress of that drive. Hub's has the neighbor over watching the basketball game. Being the perfect wife I am I get them some beer. I pop the hatch to put the beer in. There is no room with all the kids stuff. I hand the beer to Blake to put on the floor board. As I'm doing this one of the kids is rolling down the window saying....I know that guy. I look over and there is an officer talking to the kids in the back seat. I don't know if he saw the beer sitting in my kids lap up front. He asked him to roll down the window so he could see who all was in the car. Of course the beer is still on his lap and not on the floor board. This kid does nothing fast plus I usually have to tell him five times what to do. I'm trying to tell Blake under my breath put the beer on the floor while smiling at the man. So the officer looks at the beer and looks at me. He says to the kid in the backseat...is that your sister driving and then winks at me. The kids are all dramatically telling him about our trip down purgatory road. He finally walks away. I say...."Now how do you kids know him"? They say..."oh he is the officer that comes to our school and talks to us about not drinking". Priceless....the perfect end to a perfect day! If there is bad spelling and bad grammar I don't care....have a good laugh at me. I don't feel like proof reading this!