MORE DRAMA ON THE BACHELORETTE

Starts out with the famous group date. Michael G is more concerned with Ben...aka...mayor mc cheese being on it! That's going to kill you dude! I mean really I have never heard the guy mention Dez....only the Mayor!

So they walk in and are faced with a dodge ball team. They look mean as hell. There are a few of these ballers  that if I were Dez I would have wanted to trade for a few of the cheese balls. They get their asses handed to them by the ballers. Brooks pony tail probably didn't help. 

Now they are going to "ball" each other. Mickey is cracking my ass up when he walks in. What a "baller". Brooks gets hurt right away. I think he may have been trying to adjust that pony and his finger got broke. The famous ambulance arrives. Wouldn't be a good season without one. I guess Brooks won't be doing any finger licking. 

The Blue Balls take the win. On to the night date. First up we have Brian with yet another sad, sad, story. He puts on his best sad face for Dez. He's damn cute though. Just wondering if any of them care to ask if Dez has her own sad story. I find myself imagining him with his shirt off. His sad story??? I think I missed that one. 

Chris seems to be getting a little sweaty over that nasty little single rose on the table. So he drags her on the roof top. Do you ever notice they all seem to say the same thing in their interviews season after season??? "After tonight my feeling are definitely changing" "We have a connection" Insert man creepy voice. 

OMG, could Brooks be any more dramatic walking in holding his hurt finger in the air???? This is one Disney prince I might send riding off into the sunset. 

And the roof top worked....Chris gets the rose!!!!!! They get a private concert in the park. Well not so private because the vultures are buzzing above. 

Next Kasey awaits his one on one. I bet he says.."We have a connection" after. She walks in and asks to speak with Brian...dun, dun, dun....... Your screwed dude. She's totally setting him up for disaster. In walks Chris with a girl. He parades her past the guys for added drama. This is going to be good. Girlfriend right out of the gate is giving Brian the biz natch. Girl won't let anyone else talk. She doesn't even come up for air between tears and mad faces. He tries is best to defend himself. When that's not working he says..."She throws rocks at my head". As if anyone gives a shit at this point. She says..."Yes, I do". Girl should throw one at his nut sack. And he gets the boot. I see a rock imprint right between the eyes in his future. Boo bye!!!!!

Kasey your date is starting out as a buzz kill. Now the guys are all putting their two cents in about Brian. They should be wearing judges robes. That would be amusing. Brandon takes it a tad to far in his interview. Crying about it....... really?????? That's a red flag! Dude has some issues!!!!!! 

Off to Kaseys one on one. He reminds me of a chipmunk. I don't even know why. I find myself wanting to wipe that smile off his face.  Still smiling after dancing on the side of building! Another roof top date after that. Seems to be another buzz kill coming on. It's a little windy on that roof top. But he's still smiling. So do they get off the roof??? Nope they jump in the freezing pool. Kasey goes in for the big kiss. Guess what he smiles through the whole thing. It didn't look sexy at all. He does get a rose. And yes he is smiling from ear to ear. 

Another group date! They go to a stunt ranch. They get dressed up in their best cowboy get ups. Fake fighting, lassoing, and getting time with DEZ. What more could they want. They all want time alone with DEZ or the camera. Dan's pants split. Just tells me there is a nice bubble ass under there! Jaun wins her heart and gets a badge....not a rose, a badge. As the guys point out! They get to watch a movie in some uncomfortable looking stick chair! They kiss........Looks way juicier than Kaseys. He didn't smile he kissed her passionately as Dez pointed out! I see rose colored glasses in his future. 

That evening they sit around the fire in stick chairs. Weird right???? That shit can catch on fire. Bryden steals her away. They have a pretty hot kiss too. Wonder if he can taste Juan on her lips! Something is wrong with me tonight. I can't help wanting to see him with his shirt off. 

Zak....Where is that shirtless wonder from night one????? He's so different from that first night. He seems nice. But guess what "He feels a connection" Your shocked right??? James and his sad story is  sad. His poor Dad. Hope he's alright! He didn't get a kiss but he did get a rose. Zak feels defeated by this. Wait James goes in for the big kiss too. 

Pool Party.......shrinkage. Ben steals her away in the car. I love how she never lets the guys drive it. Ben's tank top may be the stupidest thing I've seen all season. Wondering if he borrowed that from his baby Mama. Of course the guys see them pull back up. Mayor mc cheese lies to the guys about seeing her. Mikey and Michael G pony up on Ben about his lie! Because Ben totally gives a shit what they think.

Meanwhile Brandon....aka....CreepO, steals her away to tell her he is "IN LOVE" with her. He even says...."I know we barely talk". Come on.....Really?????? That song "Looking for love in all the wrong places" is playing in my head! He reminds me of one of those girls we have all known. The one who thinks their in love with anyone who looks their way. He does go in for a kiss, it is super strange looking. I see a solo limo ride in this guys future.

The rose ceremony is about to begin. Brandon says he feels more confident than ever. Oh boy, this should be good! Michael G is still talking about Ben....aka...mayor mc cheese! It's getting slightly creepy. I'd be sleeping with one eye open if I were Ben.

The ceremony is the usual room of dazed and confused dudes. Some look like they could cry. Some look like their holding in farts. Others look like they are in pain. Dan is out and is bummed. Bummed because I don't ever remember him getting a kiss or any camera time. Who is Dan???? Has he been in a corner somewhere???? Like I guessed Brandon creeped her out with that "I'm in Love with you" . So he stands there as if he is watching a UFO float around the room. He is "Blown away". He says that at least three times. Says "His heart was smashed by a hammer because he was in love". Yep it's statements like these that landed him in the solo limo. He's out of tears!!!!!!!!!!! I guess he cried too much over Brian's infidelity. Boo bye! 

The bachelorette

 The first one on one date goes to Brooks.....aka.....The Disney prince. As Dez and Brooks drive away. The guys all complain about how hard it is to watch. Because they know her so well after five minutes.

I think MR Disney Prince is charming. His voice seems a little swishy though. Makes me think he's floating on light loafers. He seems sincere and honest. He throws out his best sad story. He's a smart Disney prince. He knows a women is a sucker for a sad story. We go into "I can fix and coddle him" mode. I think I may be in love with this one. He ruins it for me a little when they interview him and he says..."I feel like I know her so well already". Come on dude, really you don't know shit.....except she's hot.

Back at the house the pack of wolves await their group date card. So the group date. These bitches are going to rap. Kasey really has a perma smile that's driving me nuts. The black guy can't dance....."Really". So disappointing. Is that even possible?????? I can't help but wonder why Brandon is pant less. Captain under pants can't rap worth a crap either. During the commercial break I "google" the rap video. It's kind of funny.

After the rap party it's off to drink with 14 hungry wolves. Alright so Zak W.....aka...shirtless spray tan junkie is surprisingly nice. He may not be the circus monkey I thought he was. The journal was a nice thoughtful gift. He is much more charming with clothes on.

Mikey T...aka...Italian stallion is chatting it up(he loves to talk) with Dez when Ben...aka...Mayor Mc Cheese intrudes. He may be cute but a little overly confident for my taste. Mean while Brandon is trying to convince the guys he's not that worried about the lonely rose on the table. Bullshit.

James looks like he should have starred on the Soprano's. He is a total Ben hater. He's more worried about hating Ben than talking to Dez. While I'm watching I'm rudely interrupted by Pig Pen. He pulls his pants down to show me an ass pimple. I tell him to go show Hubs. Ben is busy talking to Dez about his kid. That's sweet and all but please dude. Maybe you should ask her some questions about her. You can only ride that kid thing so long before it gets BORING!

Brandon looks over to see Ben and Dez kissing. It's hard for him, he never expected to feel this way. This way about what???? Hating Ben or barely knowing Dez because your too busy hating Ben????? Looks like he could cry....Please cheese ball. Mikey T.....yet another Ben hater. Decides he is going to set Ben straight. You go boy.....good luck with that!

Back at the house four wolves are left waiting for a date card. Bryden gets the date! Woo woo....Military man.

They flash back to the group date. Brandon is becoming more and more of a creepy stalker. He finally gets his time to shine. Right away he hits her with his sad story. He had to raise his family since he was 11 because his mom was a druggie. He is coming on way to strong.....total creeper.

And the rose goes to Ben...aka...Mayor mc cheese. The guys are visibly pissed off about it. I'm starting to think Ben is arrogant. That is such an unattractive trait.

Time for Brydens date. He's a little Channing Tatum like. On the date he doesn't know what brie cheese is. I don't know why but I find it cute. Side note........I really want to drive that car!!!!!! Later in the date he swoops in with his sad story. He was in an accident. He even has snap shots of it. Buzz kill Military Man.....the pics were over kill. While watching him I want to push his bangs a bit to the side. He gets the rose. I guess the picture of him banged up with his Teddy bear didn't scare her off. Well played, cough, cough!

They end up in the hot tub. It's painful to watch because he has zero game. How many different ways can he say this night's amazing. About ten boring uncomfortable ways!!!!! She knows this conversation is BORING.....So she says....."Kiss me already". At least it looked like he was a decent kisser.

Off to the Rose Ceremony. Brooks, Ben, and Bryden have their perma smiles on. Michael feels the need to share his sad story. How many sad stories can one show have????? I guess he is trying to get a sympathy rose. Ben interrupts right in the middle of his sad story. This sends the guys over the edge with no arm floaties.

The Ben hating flying monkeys are released. The Ben haters seem to be more worried about him than Dez. Lots of guy drama. But now it's time for the painfully uncomfortable rose ceremony. That Robert guy seriously looks like he's going to cry. They keep flashing on him. I have to look away.

The Black guy is gone.....I'm sad he seemed pretty normal. Even if he can't dance.

Robert should have cried cause he gets his walking papers. I love when he says...."I didn't see this coming". Really cause you sure looked like you were close to tears in there.

Nick.....Is a little shocked!!!!! He talks about being heartbroken. Please dude you never even kissed her and hardly talked to her. What I'm shocked about is what a dork he sounds like!!!!!!!

The coming attractions.......An ambulance.....I'm totally shocked!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I might imagine myself as the bachelorette on Monday nights.

I look forward to Monday nights during Bachelorette season. I might just imagine myself as the bachelorette. I'm weird like that.


Bryden.....Hot, military guy. Loves dogs. Nice teeth

Will....He's from Chicago...that's a plus. He does yoga another plus. He's black....I have this sudden attraction to Black men.....He's no Tay Diggs though.

Drew.....What girls doesn't love a guy with a sad story. We love to fix things especially broken men. Nice eyes too.

Nick R....Another Chicago boy. Problem is he's a magician. Do a magic trick Nick and disappear.

Zak W.....From Texas. The opening when he jumped off the cliff in black socks and a bathing suit killed it for me. His teeth are almost too white. Then they cut to the clip of him naked on his deck. What a douche bag. Please!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Robert.....From CA. He has a cute baby face for sure. He might just get my first impression rose.

Mike....Dental student from Dallas. Great teeth. When he's walking though the forest he almost looks like he could be one of the wolf boys from Twilight.

Brandon....Adrenaline junkie with Daddy issues. Another sad boy who needs to be saved. Sexy and has great teeth.

Wondering if there is any rhyme or reason why these eight got a cameo.

I love when the first limo pulls up and you hear all the owing and awing from the car.

First guy out Drew.....She seems to think he's cute. Even does a little "Ummm, Ummm, Ummm" as he walks away. I see rose colored glasses in his future for sure. His futures so bright he better wear shades.

Next up Brooks....No "Ummmm, Ummmm, Ummmm", as he walks away. My guess is The only red in his future is a red face when he's asked to leave on the first night.

Brad.....The wishbone was clever. She seems pleasantly surprised. My guess he's staying.

Brydan...No game. Brings up Sean right out of the gate. Doesn't he know that's a sore subject. My guess is he stays though.

Michael....Takes her for a walk. She laughs uncomfortably because he's a douche kind of.

Kasey.....I want to slap that shit grin right off his face. Really dude, calm down. WTF, is with the "Hashtag" comment???? Stalker!!!!!! My guess, he goes.

Will.....The token black guy. He's going, she seems annoyed by him and his not so great personality.

Mikey....Who calls themselves "Mikey". All I can think about is that 70's commercial. The one where you give what ever you don't want to eat to "Mikey" Your an adult "Mikey" time to move up to Michael. It seems the crap he is feeding her is going in one ear and out the other. It's curtains for you Mikey!!!! You will be eating your cereal alone.

Johnathan.....Hands her a note right out of the gate. She thinks it's cute till she reads it. Fantasy suite already dude????? Please the only fantasy you can count on is dry humping your pillow! My guess, it's curtains for you. She looks at him likes he's a total douche bag.

Zak W......And the biggest douche bag award of the night goes to....... Of course this spray tan junkie gets out of the car shirtless. He is the one who drinks coffee naked on his porch. We shouldn't be surprised. Please dude put your abs away. I imagine a life with him would be him walking around naked flexing in every mirror he passes. Just think when he made love to you he would probably look down and stroke his abs instead of you. Sexy...not! If I were Des I would have sent him right back in the limo. There is nothing worst than an egomaniac. She does seem almost embarrassed for him. I love the other guys reaction when he walks in the house. They all know he won't last long.

James....Right out of the car he talks about becoming her husband. Please dude, get a clue. Women like a little more of a challenge. If he doesn't go right away he will go.

Larry....Maybe he should taken dance lessons before he pulled that move. Her face says it all. Your outta here Larry.

Nick....Magic Nick.....not a magic Mike kind of guy.

Zack...Please dude your not a five year old put on your big boy shoes.

Diogo....Ok, the knight outfit???? Epic fail. Guy needs to learn how to walk in that shit before he tries to woe her in that outfit. He was walking as if he had a corn cob up his ass. Poor Des looks embarrassed for him. He is sweet though. Sexy, not so much. Her face says it all. Your out Larry. Hope you brought a horse because that's the only thing you will be riding.

Chris.....Sweet guy. Who doesn't like a guy who gets butterflies. His joke is lame though. He did get a "funny" from her as he walked away.

Mike R.....Hello Mr spray tan with really white chicklet teeth. When are guys going to get a clue that orange spray tans are not hot.

Robert.....Nice normal guy. She seems to like him. I seem to like him too. Maybe she should call me so we can chat about him.

Juan....Sexy voice. He brought chocolate. He's a keeper.

Brandan.....aka Evil Kanievel...Please! He's lucky he's cute. He got a "Cute" as he walked away.

Brian...Pleather jacket????? Come on dude...your on TV!

Micah.....Homemade outfit????? You have to be like Channing Tatum to pull that shit off. Curtains for you!!!!!

Nick M......A poem. Cheesy dude. I'm on the fence.

Dan....Smiley kind of guy with plastic like hair. Don't know what else to say except I can't help but wonder what his hair feels like.

Brody and Ben.....I'll take Brody. But damn it if his Dad isn't cute too. I love when he puts the kid in the limo and he says..."I wish I could go to the party". I hear ya Brody, "I too wish I could go to the party".

That's all  the guys!!!!!! My head is spinning. Who will she sent home first????? Now it's party time. Ya know there will be a few token drunks.

The magician is first to make an ass out of himself. Please dude if I were her I would make him disappear.  Saved by Pin striped stallion. That coin he gives her better be a magic one. Because he's a bit cheesy. It kills me when they interview him and he says..."I know what I feel inside is real". What you feel is a chubby pin stripe pony!!!!!! He thinks he just met his future wife. Please.........

Ben is a total Casanova. Has a kid never married though. May be a red flag. I could see him in the top three. He did get the first rose. That kid shit does work. Then they keep flashing on the shirtless wonder. He seems to always be flexing. Do us a favor and go stare at yourself in the bathroom mirror because your nauseating.

The knight, I almost feel bad for him. The dancing Monkey....Laugh my ass off. Please would someone give Zak W the shirt off their back. Of course he takes his pants off next. In the pool he goes. Let the shrinkage begin. I can't believe she gives capital douche a rose. What does he do???? Flexes his abs with it of course. Who doesn't like a circus monkey though. Army boy is cute and sweet. OMG, Soccer boy kills it. Sexy with a ball. The guys even come out to ogle. Shirtless wonder still making a giant ass of himself.

Butterfly boy is a little silly. He looks super nervous. Thank God she gives him a rose. Larry is worried.....He should be he's no McSteamy. He talks with his eyes closed. Johnathan...aka...Love tank please....drop the fantasy suite crap. Get a clue dude....your a creeper. Love when he says..."My mom thinks I'm good looking". Of course she does she's your mom. Then there is the "Love tank" comment. That is one love tank that is not going to the fantasy suite. He almost seems like he smoked some magic cigs. The third time he tries to take her to the fantasy suite she sends him dry humping right out the door.

It's time for the rose ceremony. Sometimes I can't even watch these. The look on their faces are pitiful. Some look like they could cry. Others look like they could pass out. The poor Knight looks pathetic. Their on the final rose...so dramatic. Cole my favorite bachelorette watching kid is mad "home made suit boy" is gone. He thought he was funny. Then Cole says..."Desiree, is not only hot but she's got a good personalty too".

The big Dipper is out. Said he practiced that dip 50 times. On what I wonder????? Magic man disappears. He thinks she made a mistake. Don't worry there's a magic pony out there somewhere for you. The Knight didn't turn out to be her Knight in shinning armor. He's lost because he opened himself up so much and gave everything in that five minutes he talked to her. He has an explosion of love to share with someone. I feel slightly sad for him.

That wraps up the first Bachelorette. She likes them handsome for sure.

Final thoughts.....Shirtless wonder needs to go.........

Stay at home mom verses a working mom

 I have actually been both a working mom and a stay at home mom. I worked full time when I had the not so charming Prince. I also worked full time when little Drama boy came around. I worked part time for a few months after Pig Pen formally known as baby Bud Light was born. I often think about both my lives. The working one and the stay at home one. There are highs and lows to both of them. I always wanted to be a stay at home mom when I worked. I was jealous of my friends who got to stay home. I thought it sounded like the perfect life. I will never forget my last day of work. I had finally arrived in the world I thought I would never take up space in.

 What would I do with all my free time????? I would raise perfect kids, do lunches and play dates, get the house put together, go through all that shit in my closets, cook perfect dinners, and maybe take up a hobby. I could finally relax and focus on raising my kids. There would be no more trying to get myself up and ready. Get three kids out the door to daycare. No more having to miss stuff because of work. No more worrying about vacation time. I just got granted a permanent vacation. No more worrying about getting to the daycare on time in fear they will charge me more for every five minutes. No more missed games. No more missed school parties. I had all the time in the world to do whatever I wanted. This is what I dreamed about and asked for. I finally had a perfect life.

 I was sadly mistaken in some ways. I also have been blessed with lots of great memories. I did not raise perfect kids, and my closets are still a mess. I have had lots of lunches and play dates. What I wasn't banking on was being a prisoner the first few years. It was just too hard to grocery shop with a five year old, a two year old, and a new born. I would much rather chew on glass or poke my eyes with needles. I sometimes didn't brush my teeth till five and never got out of my PJ's. At one point I became frumpy and stopped trying to look fashionable. Play dates were me chasing kids who could fall in a pool and sink. Not as relaxing as I imagined. I yelled too much because we were together too much. Kids can be most annoying. They were demanding little shit birds.....more demanding than my jobs ever were. At one point I drank too much. I always liked to enjoy some cocktails with friends. It had gotten slightly out of control for awhile. I drank at night to feel like an adult and self medicate from the days shenanigans. I actually got more things accomplished when I worked. Because I needed to get things done. Now I would put things off because I always had tomorrow. I ate more than I ever ate before. I watched more TV than I ever did. I had more time to worry about every thing. Boy I worried about everything too. I watched too much DR. OZ and self diagnosed myself with lots of stuff he talked about. I would think "I feel like that, I have that pain...OMG..I'm DYING". I suffered from panic attacks for a while. Car rides became pure HELL at times. I have heard the word "MOMMMMM" more times than I can count. Some times the sound of wrappers opening sends me over the edge. I kind of lost me for a while.

I often thought I was just not cut out for this. I think in many ways my relationship with Hubs suffered over me staying home. I certainly didn't want to put out as much. I had given everything I had all day. I had nothing left. I became jealous that he got to go to work and escape the madness. Talk to adults. Sometimes I'd sit in my front yard waiting for an adult to walk by so I could talk to them. Sometimes I got caught up in gossiping and judging when I had no right. I still struggle with that from time to time. There are no sick days for sure!!!!! This was not what I had pictured in my head at all.

 Would I change anything?????? YES....But not being able to stay home. I do feel blessed that I have had the opportunity to stay home. There are lots of moms who don't ever get that. I'm very great full.  I have not missed much in my kids lives. I'm at all the games and school functions. I get to volunteer. I get to cook dinner and drive them to all their over scheduled activities. My kids have gotten to do everything they want because I stay home.  I have become an embarrassment to them. I kind of secretly like that! I hope someday they appreciate all I have done and the things I have given up....LIKE MY SANITY. These people I live with may need therapy since I stayed home. I need some too. In my mind we are even. An eye for an eye!!!

Now I am currently looking for a job again so these shit birds can drive and go to college. BITTER....naaaa....Just tired!

Let the pranking continue

Once I get pranking I have a hard time stopping! Last night I hung dolls on my neighbors tree to scare her. This evil genius plan of mine was inspired after watching "The River" with her. Last night I was at the mall Valentine shopping. Not for Hub's but with my kids for their girlfriends. My youngest doesn't have a girl he likes. So he is poking around in one of those calender slash toy stores at the mall. The store is closing down so everything is on sale. He wants to get a little something. I let him pick out a small thing. While at the check out these little miniature babies catch my eyes. My evil genius light bulb goes off and my mind starts a rolling! I start to laugh out loud as I'm paying. The lady looks at me kind of strange. She is probably thinking what a wacko I am. I say wait I need to get these miniature babies .....still laughing. She is like.....Alright in a strange voice. Still most likely thinking I'm a wacko.

I plan on sneaking into my friends house while she is at work. I'm going to plant these little babies all over. Now in the show "The River" the dolls shake at night. I wish I could find a shaking doll. On my lunch break I go home eat and then I let myself into my friends house. I'm giggling the whole time. I get her spare key and it's having a hard time going in the door. Now I'm thinking....NO please this key has got to work. So I'm wiggling it around trying to get it in. Now I'm thinking....Shit what if this key breaks in her door. This will end up being a very expensive prank. I finally get it in and open the door. I will worry about trying to get it out later. I have pranking to do. The dog meets me at the door. Thank goodness she likes me. I start to look around trying to decide where these babies are going still giggling. I can't control myself, I'm just so proud of my idea.

I'm trying to think of places that these babies will take her by surprise. The first baby goes in the fridge. That is the first place I usually go when I get home. I just wish there was a camera in there so I could see her face.
She might just be a bigger TV junkie then me. So next I place one under the controller. I'm laughing thinking about her sitting down with her homemade popcorn. She will grab the controller and she will feel that little baby under it. I bet she screams! HaHa
I often find her reading when I come over to bug her. The next logical spot is by her reading material. At this point I'm laughing cause I could just hear her say....Damn it Kerry!
Don't know how long it will take her to find this one. I sealed it back up. I bet she jumps when she sees it though.
I figure when she goes for a glass this one will be looking at her. I wish I had a recorder that would go off when she opened the cabinet. It would totally have a baby crying on it! Now I would love to see her reaction to that. I might even pay money to see that!
Coffee anyone????? Would you like a little milk in that?????
I placed one in the powder bath.
One sits waiting for her by on her nightstand.
There will be a scream when she opens her makeup drawer. Thinking glad were good friends otherwise I wouldn't feel comfortable breaking in and going in her drawers.
Be careful in the shower you never know who could be watching a baby perhaps! After I place the last of my babies I find myself being stared down by her scale. I can't take it so I get on it. I have been running and working out like a dog lately. I was on her scale three weeks ago when I started this workout plan. I almost passed out when I saw the number I hate scales! This is why I don't have them. I do have a jacket and boots on. How much can they weigh right???? I decide I need to take my coat and boots off. So here I am standing in the house I broke into about to strip off my boots and coat. As I'm standing back on the scale I wonder what her husband would say if he came home early and found me in his bathroom with my boots off on his scale. He would probably think that was scarier than the babies. So I'm kind of mad because I have not shed one pound yet. I do find since I started working out I eat way more. It's like I'm starving. It's a vicious circle I tell ya!
As I'm getting ready to leave I remember I saw some scary looking dolls upstairs one time. I decide to go up and get a few. Right before I come to the closet I think what if their eyes open and close in front of me. My overactive imagination starts running. I think that is ridiculous. So I find them and they are very scary looking. I grab two. I run down the stairs with them picturing the three I left behind chasing me.
I put the first one in the front door window looking out. It is very creepy and is starting to creep me out. As I'm going to place the other one I think......What if I come back and this one is gone. I can't believe my mind can still take me back to a scared child with a crazy imagination. What is wrong with me. I don't believe normal people freak themselves out this way.
I hide the other one under her covers. I bet this one will get a scream for sure! I can't wait to hear about her reaction to all this.
I'm leaving and that doll looks creepy looking out the window. Kind of gives me a chill. I'm having a hard time getting the key out of the door. She needs a new key for sure. Now I'm thinking please God I know I'm being bad but let this key out! It finally wiggles free. I drive back to work laughing all the way. I love stuff like this. Remember that show "Scare Tactics"???? That was some of the funniest stuff I ever saw. I would be so good as a creative director for a show like that. I have really great ideas to scare her more but I don't have the money to put into them. I would get shaking babies and pin them to all her trees in the back yard. Right at dusk they would start shaking, their eyes would open and close, and they would cry! I would also set dragon flies free in her house. In the show "The River" there is a scene where a dragon fly flies into someone's mouth and possesses them. Evil laugh!

All the sudden a bad thought pops in my head. She works till six and her daughter has track but her son will beat them all home. I don't want to scare him. I try to text her daughter for his phone number so I can warn him. Nothing! I finally get my kid on the bus. I ask if her son is on the bus. He says yes. I tell him I need to talk to him. I tell him about the dolls so he does not freak out when he goes home. He is kind of like alright whatever. I guess boys do not get worked up over dolls like us! Plus he didn't watch "The River" with us.

I have a sick feeling that she is going to try to get me back. So I get home from work waiting to get a text from her. I get the first text from her daughter. She tells me her mom is freaking finding little babies everywhere. I kind of love it! Now I'm getting text from her with pictures of the babies every time she finds one! Kind of love it. I love a good prank for sure! I know she is the type that is not going to let this slide. I see creepy babies in my future for sure! I got my game face on, so ready for a creepy baby! Now a live dragon fly might just send me running! I have to laugh cause my Twisted sister thinks I can be funny but she also thinks I ride the train too long. I might be riding this train too long!

So back to Valentine's day. My oldest talks me into buying his girlfriend a piece of real jewelry. I'm not even spending this kind of money Hubs. I know right now you are thinking I'm crazy! I know that...Hello padded cell my name is Kerry! My reasoning behind this is....Number one he is in eight grade and he has held a candle for this girl since the sixth grade. Number two is I took pics a basketball game for a friend the other day. The two of them were there. Their smiles were the kinds that were ear to ear when they talked to each other. I remember that feeling before you are paying bills, raising kids, and in the cluster fuck of life. Three he was so excited. More excited than I have seen him be about anything lately and I don't want to break that. Four is..... It is sad but I think this holiday is more exciting for these kids in puppy love. It's sad that we as adults give up on this stuff. We say it's no big deal we don't need anything. But how great would it be to get something special, a surprise. Why is it that we get lazy the longer we are together. We give up and I believe that is whole heartily the reason there is so much divorce out there. We get comfortable and put no effort into our relationships. I'm at fault too.

My middle one has loved the same girl since the first grade. He is in 5th grade now. He still holds a candle for her even though she has a boyfriend. While we are out shopping he wants to pick out something for her. As we are picking out stuffed animals and he is very into it. He wants to pick out the perfect one. I say....why she doesn't even like you like that. He says...Mom someday she will and she will remember all this stuff I did for her. This is one point in my life where I think I may have done something right. I love the fact that he is not giving up. He will be a keeper for sure!