Feeling a little panicked that night. I get on Blake's facebook account. I chat with a few of his friends as if I'm him and check out the girlfriends pictures. I've done this before but you have to be careful. You can give yourself away if you don't know their lingo and you don't dare use punctuation. Now my spelling and grammar is already awful so no worries there. The middle school kids stuff on facebook cracks me up. Seventh grade girls calling themselves SEXY LADIES. Are they for real. How many people felt SEXY in middle school. I don't even ever remember feeling sexy in high school but certainly not middle. I see that he is tagged in someones pictures. He is walking across a metal railing. If he falls I will have no worries of him becoming a baby Daddy to early. What a dumb ass though. This picture just re-affirms for me my biggest fears are not for nothing. This kid is a bit of a risk taker and slightly one of those "hey look at what my dumb ass is doing" kids. This to is just the beginning of more scary things to come. Talk about paying for your raising. I hope the Grump is getting a good laugh at this.
We went to some friends house to watch A&M get squashed. I won twenty dollars in a football pot so I was all good. My Besties were taken back to their college years at A&M so they put on a little show. Most entertaining I must say.
So still panicked about Blake I find myself laying outside his bedroom door trying to listen to his phone conversation. He is that guy, the one that smoozes (Sp???) people. A total shit talker. I don't know if I like this. I have done everything in my power to steer him clear of being that guy. I hear him say things like.....I have never been to able to talk to anyone like this before. So I'm laying on the floor making the gag sign in my mouth when he starts to shit talk me. I can't believe my ears. I thought we were different. I thought he still thought I was the greatest thing ever. He tells the girl I don't understand him. DON'T understand him????? Is he crazy, I understand every bit of it. Which is why it scares the hell out of me. This kind of makes me sad.
Blake asks me on Saturday if his girlfriend and her friend can come over. I say sure. He then tells me not to embarrass him. UMMMM, what do you mean??????? He tells me I should not saying anything about them going out or making a cute couple. Seriously I would never do that and I'm not kidding. Then he shoots me the lowest blow of all. He tells me that I think I'm funny but I'm really not that funny. Sad again, I really thought he thought I was funny. I tell him well my friends think I'm funny. Sounding like a child at this point. Again he says something like.....I'm way funnier than you are. I look at him and say where the HELL do you think you got your funny bone from?????? It certainly wasn't your Dad. He actually agrees with me. I won this battle and I feel good for now.
I feel overwhelmed with the New Years still. My house seems to be collecting useless clutter that I only seem to move from place to place still. There is still that extra fat that is not melting away on it's own. My head seems to be filled with just as much clutter as my house. I seem to move that from place to place as well. Still here in LaLa land waiting to win the lotto. First and foremost I might get myself a good shrink! This teenager I live with is aging me quickly.
1 comment:
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