Kids

Crazy thing I sit here and think about whats it's like to raise kids. It's hard you second guess yourself all the time.

As much as they make you cry they make you belly laugh 1000 times over.

As much as they drive you crazy you look forward to what their going to do next.

As much as they hurt your marriage they save it ten times over.

As much as they make you question who you are they define who you are.

As much as they spend your money, money can't buy what they give you back.

As much as you drive them around you can't get back the things you talk about while driving.

As much as you give up they give you so many things in return.

As many times that they do something bad they do something that makes you proud.

As many times you think they are not listening they say something that makes you realize they are listening.

Writing this blog and looking back at my postings is starting to make me think I need a good shrink. I am at a loss sometimes I feel very deflated at times. I sometimes wonder what life would have been like if I made other choices. Sometimes I feel like my life is no longer mine. I start to think I should have been something. I have talents I'm not using. But then I look back at some of the post and think I am doing something. Maybe I'm not doing it the way I always imagined it, with perfect kids and all. The blog makes me feel not so invisible I'm writing things down even though my grammar is horrendous and realizing I have the hardest most rewarding job in the world. Some of things I've written I would have already forgot the details of if I hadn't written it down. Some I probably should not have written, hubby says I may be putting to much info out there for people to judge. My 12 year old came to me with a problem today, it was almost up there on the most ridiculous shit ever problem. I caught myself about to say something like "wait till you have real problems". Then I thought ok even though this is ridiculous to me it is real to him. People all ages just want to be validated not blown off or told their feelings are no big deal. Kids don't care about our adult problems and they don't want to hear about them. So I took the high road, listened and gave him some advise that he may use or he may not. I made him feel like this most ridiculous thing was important. These are times when I don't feel so deflated and even though this problem was silly by listening I validated this for him. I'm starting to sound like frickin Dr. Phil so I will be signing off now. Always interesting with these people I live with!