School starts late today

School started two hours late today because our city pretty much shuts down when it snows. I stayed up extra late last night thinking my kids would sleep in. Every morning I have to drag their ass out of bed. I listen to them complain that their to tired to brush their teeth and their to tired to get dressed. Not this morning they came down like spring chickens ready to rock and roll. This really put a damper on my sleeping in, like I said before I'm no morning gal. I found myself having to entertain instead of sleep. I tell them hey go take your I-pod touches upstairs and play. I kick back to chillax alittle on the sofa, I start to doze off a bit and all the sudden it sounds like they are bowling upstairs. Well enough said I couldn't get their asses out of here fast enough so I could lay back down. I don't get why I can not fall asleep at night but I can fall asleep in a minute during the day.
LADY AT THE BANK
I finally get up at 11 and drag ass for awhile. I find myself torn between TV, the computer, and my David Sedaris book. BTW, David Sedaris writes some seriously funny books. I had one thing to do today before the kids get home and that was go to the bank. Don't ask me why but I decide to go in the bank instead of the drive through since I'm doing a few things there. I walk in and there is no one behind the counter. This overly friendly girl walks up and says " can I help you" and lures me into her office. Now I know this is never a good thing she is going to try and sell me something and I'm a huge sucker. She takes my checks and she goes in for the kill. She says "are you happy with your checking and savings account?"......Yes, I am. This is when I think umm I'm going to play stupid. She says "what do you do for a living?"......NOTHING. "You must do something" she says....NO NOTHING. She then says "are you married?".....yes. "Well then what does your husband do?".....he's in furniture. She asks "do you keep these amounts in you checking and savings consistently?"....I don't know I have no idea whats even in there. So I end up getting out of there with just my deposit slip. She must have gotten in trouble for not selling me because my phone rings 10 minutes later and its her. She now wants me to sign up for overdraft protection-credit card. I tell her I'm not allowed to have a credit card. From now on I will be using the drive through at the bank.

PICKING UP THESE PEOPLE I LIVE WITH
I go from the bank to the school to pick up two of these people I live with. My friends daughter is coming home with us. Cole has had a crush on her since we moved here. All the kids get into the car and Cole in the most dramatic voice is telling her that she is the love of his life. I look back and give him the Mom stare that means shut the hell up! I'm afraid he is going to embarrass her. I'm kinda starting to think I'm raising little love sick puppies. He then goes on to tell her that he will date her when they get to HS and after college he will marry her. Now I have to admit I'm glad that he has listened to me on dating in HS and marriage after college, see I'm not the worst Mom in the world ever. Then comes the big one in his very dramatic voice that I couldn't even begin to describe he tells her that she is the one. I'm laughing inside myself at this point thinking I should have not let him grow up watching "One Life To Live". We get home and I ask him if I can have a word with him. We go to my bedroom and I try to explain that I know he is in love but I think he might just be making her uncomfortable. "OK Mom but let me tell you LOVE is a strong word and should not be used lightly, I know that and I mean what I say" he says. I'm thinking did this kid just drop down out of a Hallmark movie?????? I blame Blake his older brother who also thinks he is in love, Cole wants to be just like him.
WHERE ARE MY GLASSES
Hubby walks in from work and I'm cooking bacon spaghetti. Now when the bacon comes out of the oven all these people I live with start circling like sharks. I find myself guarding the bacon so I can get it in the sauce before they eat it. One time when I was making this same dish I made the mistake of leaving the room when I came back half the bacon was gone. Hubby says "have you seen my Oakley's?" Now this is a HUGE pet peeve of mine. I can't even tell you how many times these people I live with ask me where THEIR shit is. I give him the look and say "how would I know where YOUR Oakley's are?" I don't know if any of you others find this most annoying but I think why the hell should I be in charge of all your stuff???????
FLUORESCENT LIGHTING
Anyone who has read any of my previous post know that I hate fluorescent lighting. So hubby every time a light bulb blows out changes it and replaces it with a fluorescent bulb. He says this will save us money on the electric bill. People look like crap under fluorescent lights, this is a fact of life. I personally have no problem living with the soft filtered lights and paying an extra five dollars a month. I have never understood why they put fluorescent lighting in dressing rooms. I know longer try clothes on in there, I'm a huge believer that ignorance is bliss! My sister always gets on me for not trying stuff on. Sorry twisted sister but if I never had to look at my ass in fluorescent lighting again I would be a happy camper. If I owned a clothing store I would serve wine and have soft lighting in the dressing rooms.....I would make a killing!!! BTW, once hubby puts florescent in the bedroom I'm moving out! Anyway another fabulous day with these people I live with.

Snow Day

We have lived in Austin almost three years now. This is the biggest snow I have seen. The kids went to school and I went back to bed. My phone rang a couple of times and I ignored it and keep sleeping. I know alot of you think of me as a slug cause I go back to bed everyday. I saw something on Dr OZ that said sleep heals your cells so I think of it as healing. I have zero guilt for going back to bed, I seem to get the best sleep in those two hours and I have some pretty crazy dreams too. I got up at 10am and checked E-mails, called my sister, and got on FB. Now I do have much guilt about FB I can't believe I waste my time on there looking at everyones pictures. There is a knock at the door and it's my neighbor. She informs me that the kids are getting out of school at one for a snow day. So the phone call I ignored was from the kids schools. I go back to the computer and eat three cupcakes, now I do have guilt about this too. My damn friend Sharri gave me this ridiculously good cupcake recipe and I can't stop eating them.

I go to the school at 1pm to get the kids. I end up in the back of a line that has about 50 people in front of me picking up their kids. The line is so long that I'm stuck outside the building. I'm not at all dressed or prepared for this. I guess my lame brain wasn't thinking that there would be a huge line to check the kids out. I find myself making small talk with the parents I'm in line with. Then I have this really bad habit of sizing up people I don't know. So I'm standing there looking at peoples crows feet wondering if mine look like that. I'm checking out who looks put together and who doesn't. I see someone with large pores so I'm wondering what mine look like. It doesn't help that the school has the worst possible fluorescent lighting ever. I try not to ever check myself out in the school mirrors because I just can't believe I look that bad. Now at this point if someone has the same bad habit as me then I'm in trouble since I'm standing there in sweatshirt with paint stains, pants that make my ass look awful, and best of all last nights makeup since I fell asleep on the sofa watching Oprah. I also have a bad habit of trying to guess people's age I'm not proud of this at all, this has just happened to me in the last few years. So I'm in this ridiculously long line wondering who is older that me and who is not. Sounds really silly I know but I have an overactive mind. I think my dream job might be that person at the State fairs who guesses peoples weight and age. It takes me 40 minutes from the time I left my house till I got home with the kids.

My Dog Ziggy LOVED the snow. He was running around like crazy in it. You can see by the snowflake on top of his head that the flakes were a good size. He had such a great time chasing all the kids in the snow.

The kids run in and we try to suit up as best we can for snow weather. Since we live in Texas we don't really have snow stuff. They have a great time in the snow. All the kids in the hood are out throwing snow at each other.

Everything is going well at first and then of course the chaos starts. First Aidan comes in to change clothes because someone put snow down his shirt. Then Cole comes in crying cause he got a snowball to the face. Then Aidan comes in crying about something that Cole did. At this point I don't really hear anything they are saying...it all starts to sound like Blaaah Blaaah Blaaah.

The pantry has been haunting me for months. While the kids are out in the snow I think I'm going to tackle this monster of a pantry. My hubby told me a few months ago it needed to be cleaned up. He should have never done that. When he tells me something like that even if I want to clean it I won't!!!! I know another not so great trait about me. The problem really came to my attention when a neighbor called to borrow something and I had to call them back so I could look for it in this mess of a pantry. For God sakes I don't even know what I have in here. My house is very clean until you open a closet or the pantry.

Holy Shit this is one side of the pantry all out on the kitchen counters. I spend the next hour washing down the shelves and throwing away things that are out of date.

Waaaa Laaaaa, this only took one hour of my time. I feel like a weight as been removed from me. I don't know if anyone else does this but I keep walking by it just to look at it.

The kids finally come in soaking ass wet! They would like some hot chocolate....well guess what we happen to have some in this super clean pantry. Hubby gets home shorty after this. Cole tells him all Mommy does all day is watch TV and play on the computer. What the hell this is already a sour subject with us. Thank God I cleaned the pantry so I have something to show for my day. I say hey Cole while you were out in snow playing I cleaned and organized the pantry, I did a load of laundry that's all put away, I picked up all the leaves that you guys dragged in every time you came in to cry or complain, and I flushed the potty twice behind you! I know it's immature to throw things in a nine year old face but jeez how did I get this kid who likes to throw me under the bus. In the mean time Blake has two friends over I seem to do much better with these age kids. The problem is every time I pass them all I can smell is farts and they find this really funny. They are upstairs and I go on the computer and get sucked into FB. I go to my home page and see Blake has just posted that he is in a relationship.....HaHa at twelve. My first instinct is to comment something smart ass to him. I do remember being in middle school and my parents would laugh at me for this same kinda stuff. I hated that more than anything so I step away from the computer. Well anyway another fabulous day with these people I live with.

Cole turns nine.

Cole turned nine today. He was my easiest birth, he is the only one that I have full on makeup and I don't look half bad after his birth. I remember when I first saw him I was expecting a blonde blue eyed baby that looked like my oldest Blake. Not so much this kid came out with a full head of dark hair, nice dark eyebrows, and a red face. I'm so glad I never got drunk and blacked out before I got pregnant with him or it would have really scared the shit out me that day. The one thing that really stands out about his birth is I had this ridiculously hot young doctor. Half way through his birth I blow the biggest fart on this ridiculously hot Doc! I stop pushing and start apologizing....the Doc is like hey keep pushing forget the fart. As much as this one is my biggest challenge he is also my child with a huge heart. This kido has more personality he makes me laugh every day. He also out of my three is the first one to jump up to help me with anything. Cole is very dramatic and wears his heart on his sleeve for sure. He definitely spikes my blood pressure on a daily basis. I believe it is because he puts his whole heart in everything he does including driving me nuts at times. He will probably be famous some day cause he has good looks, giant personality, he can sing and dance, and you've seen no drama like Cole drama. When he becomes famous he owes me a great vacation!

Cole made cupcakes for his class too. I'm just hoping that no egg shells ended up in the batter since he insisted on doing the whole process himself.

He is so proud. What I love about him is he picked pink cupcakes with pink frosting. Now that is a confident kid. His brother made fun of him for the pink and his response was "girls like pink and real men wear pink". I LOVE that!

Since his B-day fell on Monday I brought him some Sonic to school for lunch.

We stopped at "Hey cupcake" for a sweet treat....but they were closed...:(((

What a trooper, he has a huge smile on his face even though hubby scheduled a dentist appointment on his B-day. I love that he has the crazy B-day hat on and wears it with confidence.

Since Aidan and Cole B-days are one day apart they are getting their big gift today. How cute are they waiting hiding their eyes. Hubby at first comes in with a plunger and a hammer for them. Aidan says "That's a joke right" Cole is like "Wait that's no fair"

They asked for this little razor motorcycle for X-mas, since they both asked for I-pod touches as well I couldn't get it. I found this little motorcycle for 50% off after X-mas! I love when a get a good deal like that.

I made these great homemade cupcakes that my friend Sharri gave me the recipe for. The kids loved the homemade frosting. This day turned out to be a great day with these people I live with!

Aidan turns 7 today! The day had many ups and downs.

So my baby turned seven today. This is really hard for me to believe how fast the time has gone. I'm in bed and hear this little very soft spoken voice say "it's my B-day and no body has wished me a happy B-day" I open one eye and there sits Aidan on the side of my bed. Oh honey happy B-day!!!! He says "I still have doo doo on my B-day and that's just not fair" No that's not fair at all but how about you let Mommy get another hour of sleep in. I go back to sleep and I'm awaken from the sound of a cleaning frenzy going on in the house. Hubby is very anal so I decide I will just keep sleeping and let him finish cleaning. I know if I get up he will put me to work. I know I sound evil at times but I just don't care. I finally get up around 10 and the kitchen is sparkling clean plus he is just finishing up washing the floors. I have timed this perfectly.

Some of the family has sent Aidan money for his B-day so we go out shopping. Cole is turning nine tomorrow so he goes with his B-day money as well. Everything is going great, we have a nice ride to the stores. While shopping at toy r us Cole wants to buy a basketball hoop that's made for a three year old. I put my foot down and say you can't get that it is silly. This starts the war. Cole is arguing with me that it is his money and he could spend it the way he wants. I suggest several other better ideas but they are just not flying. Aidan get a plane that by the way broke five minutes after we got home. Cole says he's not getting anything and he doesn't even want to celebrate his B-day. OK, whatever just get in the car. We were also heading to Target and Academy. In the car heading to Target I'm getting a ear full of things like, take me home, your the worst Mom ever, I'm having the worst B-day ever, and No body likes me! In my overactive mind I'm thinking I'd like to drop your ass on the side of the road, Your the worst kid ever, and your damn right no one likes you cause you suck!!!!! I refuse to be brought to that level so I just say, sorry your sad I hope your day gets better. We pull up to Target and he his refusing to get out of the car. He is a sight let me tell you, for he now has full on snot running out of his nose from crying. I don't have any Kleenex in the car so I give him a receipt to wipe his nose. At this point he has sent me to the deep dark place so I tell him get your ass out of the car before I give you away to a Mom who is the worst Mom in the world. He gets out finally and I'm trying to explain to him it's no fun to do nice things for someone who does not appreciate them. He is calming down finally, I don't know cause I'm not a middle child but people tell me this is a middle child thing. I really pretty much feel like a failure, how could I have raised this Demon! He finds something he likes at Target and all is well. On the way home I try to tell him how the way he acted is just not right. He does tell me he is Sorry and I'm not the worst Mom ever. Your damn right kid someone else might of flat out kicked your ass! Now of course I would never tell him that but damn he makes me think some evil things!

We get home and I started this tradition where the kids make their own cupcakes for school. Now note to you people who don't have this age children don't start this tradition! This is a nightmare waiting to happen. I always have these great ideas thinking they are my kids and they will get bored and I will finish the job. Not so much they want to do everything.....which makes for many cleanups on aisle 1! At least if you do this because it does make them feel important DO THE FROSTING YOURSELF!

Of course they love to lick that frosting which makes for a fabulous sugar rush! I'm a Dr. Oz crazy women and he just had a show saying that the sugar rush in children is a myth. I call bullshit.....he needs to hang with mine after alittle sugar.

See all my bitching and in the end look at how proud this kid looks with his homemade cupcakes. I AM NOT THE WORST MOM IN THE WORLD EVER!

I got Blake a gift to give each of his brothers. This makes him feel part of the day and important. This hopefully teaches him the joy of giving instead of receiving all the time.

Wow, look at the excitement on his face this makes my non paying, hair raising, blood presser job worth it.

Oh they look cute but they can be pure EVIL! Anyway another fabulous day with these people I live with!

On the road again!

So I'm not a morning gal at all and never have claimed to be one. I can never seem to get my ass in bed before 1 or 2 in the morning, this is my down time. I love to FB and watch all the crappy tv that I dvr. When the kids are in soccer season it means 10 weeks of hell for me. We not only eat fast food, which there is not much to pick from out here or we eat out of the crock pot, which is hard to be creative with for 10 weeks. So sleeping in on a Saturday morning is un heard of at this time. Last night I went to bed at 1 and tossed and turned because my mind likes to play tricks on me about all the TV I could be watching at this time. I got up and got Aidan to his 9am game. This may seem late to you but you have to remember I live out in the middle of no mans land, so I have to go at least 15 miles to get him to his game. This is no easy task to get three up and ready plus myself. So we drive to Aidans game, drive 15 miles back home, eat something and get ready for Blakes 12:30 game. Get back in the car to go another 15 miles to his game. Blakes game gets over and I have to drive back to my house to drop a few off at a birthday party. I drop them off get back in the car and take Cole to his 2:30 game. Coles done drive him back out by the house to drop him off at a party. Drop Cole off back in the car to go 12 miles to the grocery store, at this point the only thing going through my head is "on the road again" that damn song is playing over and over again in my head. Back from the grocery store and I go to pick them up from the party. We get home and Aidan and Cole want to go overnight at their friends house......great I say since I was going to have to take them to Dave and Busters for their B-day.....this is a good way to put that shit off. So were in the house for 2 minutes and I hear Aidan from the bathroom say "my doo doo is back and its not good." F@#k I think! He comes out and says I can't go to someones house with doo doo problems. No, you can't. Anyway we end up meeting some friends at the stadium. This is a sports bar in our neighborhood where you can bring the kids and even your dog I think! We get there and there is a dog running through the restaurant, only in Texas! Were leaving to go home and Cole is going home with the friend to spend the night. As were walking to the car Aidan says "Mommy I can spend the night" I say No honey were going home. Aidan says "I just went doo doo and it's all good now" That's great honey but your coming home with us. Alittle crying on his part and alittle bribing on my part and we go home together. So needless to say these people I live with caused me to go through a half of tank of gas in a matter of hours!
So while at the stadium Blake wins these stuffed animals! When I look at them the only thing I can think of is vaginal disease. I know I have a sick sense of humor. So I know hubby is in the mood, so when we get home I say look honey my womanly parts are all itchy, bitchy, red, and just plain mad! I really don't think you want any part of this! Of course I'm the only one who finds this funny at all!

Why me?????

So as I said all three boys are playing soccer. Which means practices almost every night of the week. I go to get Aidan from a neighborhood football game to go to practice. We get home and he freaks out about going to practice. I send him to his room. I tell him I'm taking away your I-pod and you have to come in and go to bed right after school for a week! He says FINE. What do I do with this????? So I'm in his room while he is pouting and I see his jar of money that he has been saving for awhile. I say fine I'm going to take your jar of money so I can pay myself back for the soccer season I just paid for. Alot of crying and he says fine again. WHAT????????????????? I'm at a loss here, I no longer no what to do. I go downstairs to make sure Blake is getting ready because he to has practice. I get down there and he is laughing at me. What the heck are you laughing at I say???? What are you going to do now Mom? I have no idea. I go back up and Aidans B-day is Sunday so I tell him if you don't get your sorry butt downstairs you will not have a birthday! This finally gets him moving. We pass hubby in the car on the way to practice, so I roll down the window and give him the short version. I tell him he needs to set Aidan straight when we get home. Aidan has calmed down on the ride there and says he is sorry. He then says can you please call Dad before we get home so he is not mad. I think to myself why are my kids always so worried about hubbys feelings???? I have feelings too.

Anyway after practice he had a great time and loves soccer once again. All that bitching for nothing!

Are those stolen flowers for me???

So I pick the kids up from school. Cole and Aidan want to walk with their friends. I take the other kids I pick up home and settle in for alittle Extra on the TV. Cole walks in and says Mommy I got you some flowers cause I love you! I turn around and there he is standing with these clearly stolen flowers. he has two sets in his hand the first one is pulled from someones flower bed.

Here is the second set! You can clearly see he has pulled these fake ones out of a neighbors flower pot.

OMG, that was so sweet but where did you get those????? Did you take them from someones house???? Cole says well they were in front of someones house. I say Oh honey that was really sweet but you can't take them because they belong to someone else.

Oh but I saw them and thought of you! What do you say to that????? I tell him he will have to show me where you got them so we can return them. I guess it's the thought that counts right???

Sleeping through the Austin plane crash.

So got the kids to school. Went back to bed because I'm a slug at heart. Got up at 10, well maybe 11! Got on FB and my friend Sharri messages me that she is reading about the plane crash in Austin! WHAT???? I hate flying so I hate to hear about plane crashes. Every time I have to fly I stress for weeks before I even get on the plane. I dream about stressing about getting on the plane. I go though every "What if" in my head! It sounds ridiculous but I drive myself almost to the point of insanity. I have imagined my plane going down in every way possible and then I read the secret and freaked myself out more thinking that it will happen cause I'm picturing it! I know I sounds crazy but its a very real fear for me. Well this crash did not freak me out since it was some dude who was pissed at the IRS and crashed on purpose. Well we made the national news here in Austin, keep it weird...I guess!

I didn't sign up to be a referee

I'm telling you after these last two days I think I'm going to go on line and buy myself a referee uniform along with a loud ass whistle! I don't know if any of you other people feel like your more of a referee than a parent, well that's where I'm at! I spend my days breaking up fights, trying to get kids to listen, and helping kids with homework that I sometimes have to google to figure out myself. The madness has started with three boys playing soccer.......this means practices almost every night of the week....which also means three games every Saturday. Not to mention hip hop for two and guitar for the other. I feel I have no time for me since I'm either driving someone somewhere or breaking up a fight. I'm thinking of putting a padded sound proof room in my house, maybe for myself more than them so I can go in there and yell F@#K!!!! I find myself saying all the things I swore I would never say to my kids like "When I was your age" Well guess what they don't care about when I was their age just like I didn't care when my parents said it. How about the famous one when you have run out of steam to argue anymore and you say "because I said so"....I always hated that the the most! I have had to take everything away from my 12 year old because his grade is slipping in a class. I don't know how to get through to him....drives me nuts. I caught myself saying "this hurts me more than you" now it really does.......but I remember being a kid and thinking my parents were full of shit when they said that. Kids just don't get it. I keep my cool for a long time and after I tell them to do something five times I find myself yelling. They are like why are you yelling???? Hello people I wouldn't be yelling if you would have just listened to me the first five times. Once again they honestly have no clue. Then in the end they say something that makes me laugh. Aidan tonight says " I feel OK but for some reason I have doo doo" I don't know why but I found myself laughing at that. All I know is I hope I'm around to watch them raise their own kids, I'm going to sit back and laugh my ass off. Especially since mine have a bad habit of telling me that when they have kids they are going to let them have anything they want and do anything they want. Yeah buddy good luck with that and let me know how that works out for you. Anyway sorry for bitching tonight but life has been alittle tough with these people I live with lately!

40th Birthday party 70's style

I had a 70's theme birthday party for my 40th. I stressed for weeks trying to plan this party. I second guessed everything from having it at the house, having costumes, what to serve for food, and what to serve for drinks. It ended up turning out great. Peoples costumes were great, the food was good, and hiring a bartender was the best part. My sister made stickers with my face for everyone to wear, they were pretty clever.

We had some pretty fun characters show up for this shin dig. My friend Christina's costume was to cute.

My Mother in law, Sister in law, and Brother in law drove in from Dallas to help me celebrate.

My Mom and Dad look pretty damn good I must say. My Mom thought the bartender was a waste of money. Of course she told me this the next day while she was eating her words, cause now she thought he was worth the money. Could you imagine 40 plus people trying to make cosmos and Mexican martinis! I guess I'm still alittle immature cause it makes me happy when I'm right and my Mom is wrong. My Mom was a huge help to me getting ready for this party she cleaned the shit out of my house. Love you Mom if your reading this. I still love that I can think not say I told you so.

Hubby was a good sport about dressing up. This is more my idea of fun than his. We did have a few little disagreements leading up to the party. About the only thing he was on board with was having a bartender. Now that surprised me I thought for sure I would have to put out the get a bartender added to the list. He tried to cheap out the party out a few times and I kept saying I will not cheap out my 40th. I can't tell you how many times he said do you really need that. In the end he came through for me like he always does. So thank you hubby for a terrific party.

Can you tell we all shopped at the same place for our shoes. We all went to Lucy's in Disguise in Downtown Austin. What a crazy place, I may just go back some time to people watch. Lucy's was packed with the strangest variety of characters, kinda makes you wonder what all these people need costumes for. While shopping in there I kept telling the workers that I was shopping for my 40th birthday 70s style. Once again I was throwing that out there in hopes that one person would say 40????REALLY???U don't look it!!!! No such luck again.

I'm so glad my Mom and Dad were at the party, they are always alot of fun. I just wish my Brother and Sister could have been there.

Now I wouldn't have wanted to run into these to creeps in a Disco in the 70's.

My disco theme cake turned out great. If anyone needs a great cake lady I can get you her number. What was nice is it looked great and tasted even better.

We would have been a fun group in the disco.

You can tell I'm starting to feel no pain here. Scooby dooby Doo Where are you?? Do you think they have the word Dooby in his name for a reason????

John Travolta shows up at the party for alittle dance fever, I think he brought Sandy from back in his Grease days. We also had a couple of 70's gym teachers stop by in hopes that they could do the hustle. John promises to keep this party "stayin alive"

All my friends make it and we are having a great night doing karaoke and dancing.

The drinks are flowing so alot of us start to get some liquid courage.

"Your so Vain" very hard song to sing and we sounded like shit! Theres a video out there that will not show up on this blog.

Sonny doesn't look happy that Cher seems to have traded him in for a new singing partner. Now Sonny's singing "I Lost You Babe"

Austin Powers and his hot date show up to check out all the sexy bitches. He is hoping that Dr Evil does not show up. He asks me if he could use my room to shag his date my reply is Oh be-have Austin.

Sonny keeps telling everyone "Mama was a rock-in-roll singer and Papa used to write her songs." Cher is getting sick of listening to him so she decides to go. Sonny sings "Baby don't go." Cher says "you lost me babe".....Sonny's response is "The beat goes on"

As the night goes on the karaoke gets louder and more obnoxious.

Some jerk dog gave me K*Y touch massage warming gel! Here it is in mid air cause I'm throwing that shit away. I don't need that shit, I get more sex than I want already. I don't need anything that's going to get hubby's wheels turning. Shame on you. Just Kidding really I got lots of great and funny gifts from everyone.

At this point I'm thinking to myself what happens in the Scooby van stays in the Scooby van.

This was on of my favorites because my friend Jason was unrecognizable. I believe my Dad stood up in a wedding and wore this same suit.

Now these are some Afros, almost kinda makes me wish I was older in the 70's. I would have enjoyed the Disco Days.

Zoinks, you know your drunk when your out on the dance floor and you think you have good moves.

Who's brilliant idea was this????? I thought these were my friends here. Why does it always seem like a good idea to do a shot when you know this is the one that going to send you over the edge. I can just hear Scooby saying "it's the great boneyard in the sky for you"

This is what I would look like with a lifestyle lift and I like it.

I decide to give myself a homemade lifestyle lift!!! Dontcha wish you girlfriend was hot like me?????

The kids were not allowed at the party but they did have fun trying the wigs on before they went overnight to a friends house.