Navy Pier

We headed to Navy Pier against my better judgment. My Mom loves to go out there ALL DAY AND ALL NIGHT!

Here we are on the train! We know we are going to be whipped after this outing!

So since Grumpy Old guy got this granddaughter we have all become shit to him. He doesn't even notice the rest of us if she is in the room! She kind of took my spot, if she wasn't so damn cute I might have to kick her a$$!

I had to post this picture because I was on the escalator trying to get a shot of everyone arriving at Navy Pier. I was standing backwards on this escalator when I went ass over tea kettle at the end! Did anyone help me????? Hell no they all laughed at my blue panties since I had a skirt on! Blake even text all his friends about my mishap. Kelly couldn't wait to post it on FB. No one seemed to give a shit that my a$$ really hurt. Karma is a bitch...they better watch their a$$.

Kelly and I were talking about the cute train guy when we got off. Blake chimed in telling us he was gay because of his earrings. I said he was Metro. The guy turns around and tells us he can hear us talking because voices carry in the station. Kelly and me want jump under the train but Blake is laughing! He was one hot metro sexual though. We all jumped on the water taxi to head over to Navy Pier.

As soon as we get off the water taxi Kelly tries to get her hooks in some half dead billionaire. Then she realizes he is already a stiff. Better luck next time, Kelly.

Blake finds some kids to run around with. He ends up thinking they are a little rough around the edges, so we roll.

Cole and Aidan always have to do everything Blake does.

Aidan steals a kiss before we leave this scene.

We head over to Bubba Gumps, with Grandpa Grumps for some lunch. I can't believe it but they don't serve Dr Pepper here. Wasn't that Forests favorite drink? One of the guys that work there is a Snoop Dog look a like. My kids are fascinated by him. Every time he walks by Blake tries to get a pic of him with his camera phone.

Aidan of course needs to go to the bathroom right after we get there. I take him to the bathroom and there is a lady guarding the men's room door. She tells us we will have to wait a minute. We stand there with this other guy thinking they must be cleaning it or something. Not the case at all, some loud and in charge lady pops out of there and says when you gotta go you gotta go! Now that takes balls to have your friend close down the men's room so you can take a shit. Not to mention pretty much tell everyone you just took a shit in there. There was a pretty big line waiting to get into the ladies room so I guess she must have had no choice. It kind of reminded me of the days when I worked at Havertys. I had a thing about pooping in public. The Havertys I worked at had two floors so they had a bathroom on each floor. I made an "Out of Order" sign for the upstairs bathroom. I kept this sign under the sink in that bathroom so when I would have to go I would just hang the sign on the door. It really worked like a charm most of the time. There is always that one a$$hole that pays no attention to things like that and does what they want anyway. So I was caught with my stink on a time or two.

The boys want to ride the Sea Dog at Navy Pier. That is all the boys but Aidan. He is a bit of a nervous Nelly and was to scared to ride on this boat. I really can't believe this since we own a boat and he is a huge boat lover. I feel bad for him because he is just like me. He will miss out on a lot of fun things if he doesn't get over this. The nice thing is he will at least be the voice of reason when they get in HS.

The boys have a great time on the Sea Dog. They came back with their hair standing straight up. My poor Grumpy Old guy came back with a empty wallet. Everything is so damn expensive at Navy Pier.

I like how long my legs look in this mirror! I have never seen myself with long legs before.

We are enjoying a cold one and listening to some great music when they announce the band will be taking a short break. They fill the time with a few audience participation games. Kelly and me drag the Grump over to the game because he is always lucky. My Mom and me have a running joke about getting "A JOE KANE" pass when we win something or get out of something. Every time this guy gets pulled over he gets out of it. Whenever something bad happens to him he comes out of it just fine. Like the time he had a heart attack refused to get in an ambulance and drove himself to the hospital. Who does that and lives to tell about it. Anyway he won this little game of course and got us some ride tickets!

We of course have to ride the Ferris Wheel. They always stop us for that over priced picture that we buy every year.

The boys go in a hanger by themselves. While at the top a helicopter goes by. Blake tells Aidan that the helicopter is going to crash into the ride. Aidan starts to cry, he was already nervous going on this ride. I could strangle Blake sometimes. A lot of Aidan's nervousness comes from all the crap Blake has told him over the years.

The girls are in the next hanger. Kelly just pinched Ella as she handed her off to me for a picture. She tries to make me look bad but I got her number.

I really don't want to go on the swings at the end of the night. I talk Kelly into taking Aidan. I'm just excited that he is not afraid to go on this. Every time she goes by me she shoots me the bird. She can be so ugly to me!

We decide to leave at around nine O'clock. We hop on the water taxi to go back to the train station. At the half way stop to the train some dumb asses get on the taxi with out a ticket. This slows everything down. We ended up at the train station five minutes late for our train. We have to wait another hour for the next train. Who gets on a water taxi without a ticket anyway. We end up in Mac Donald's eating ice cream sundaes. Boy you can't beat those for a dollar.

Kelly can't help but be ugly to me again on the train. Since we are on the train at 11pm we are surrounded by drunk people. There was a SOX game and a Bon Jovi concert down there this night. I love people watching on the drunk train.

Quick story from earlier today. I was at Walmart which you always see some crazy people there. What is it about that place??? You don't see that crowd at Target. I'm buying dog food and socks. The lady checking me out says......what kind of four legged friend do you have???? The bad part of me wants to make reference to that vibrator that everyone raves about called "The Rabbit". I know that will just go over her head though. I tell her I have a Doberman-Lab mix. She tells me she has eight dogs and a cat. Great, I say! I tell her I like my dog more than the people I live with. She tells me that her dogs are the only ones who don't get scared when she walks in the room naked. I do have to laugh out loud for sure. I'm walking to my car picturing this women naked in bed with eight dogs and a cat. For some reason that Mr. Rogers song is running through my head. You know the one......Who are the people in your neighborhood, in your neighborhood, in your neighhhhborhoodddddd. There the people that you meet when your walking down the street each day. I think Saturday night live may have a skit with that song in it. I think people are strange and very interesting. I love when someone tells me some crazy thing like that. I still have lots of Chicago post to go, so until next time. I'm off to hang with these people I live with.

Arlington Park race track

Every year my Mom's side of the family goes to Arlington park race track for the day. Here are all the girl cousins. Notice Kelly and me are the "the pale faces" in this group. The nice thing for Kelly and I is we look tall next to these two hot tan biatches.

This is my grumpy old guy. My sister seems to think she is his favorite. Truth be told I am the favorite one, partly because I cook so good. Kelly can barely cook mac&cheese. When it comes to the time where someone will have to take the old grump ass in he will definitely choose door number one. He knows he's going to get fed at my house.

See the hate in her eyes because she knows I am the "chosen one". She is just so bitter, I almost feel sorry for her. It's hard to be number 1 sometimes.

Here's my Aunt Sue. Sue is a terrific singer and everybody loves when she belts out with some made up song of hers. I will forever hear the sound of sweet Sue's voice singing "Jingle Bell Rock" at Christmas.

Blake loves hanging with my Aunt Maureen and cousin Steph. Maybe it's because they make him look tall. I really think it's because Aunt Maureen is the only one that will go on crazy roller coasters with him.

This is Aunt Dawn and Uncle Bobby. They have three boys like me so they can feel my pain. My Uncle Bobby is one of those guys that will be standing there talking to you and pull an unwrapped cookie out of his pocket and eat it. No one ever knows where he got these cookies from or how long they have been in his pocket. I don't know if he does this for shock value or if he is really that strange. Maybe he is just a victim of growing up with the Debbie Downer sisters. Every year he gets the kids a set of collectors coins. Aunt Dawn and Uncle Bobby have hearts of gold! I wouldn't trade this cookie monster freak for anything even though he sports a wife beater shirt on a daily basis.

While at the track I pick my horses according to the names I like. The first win I have is on a horse named Tiger. I picked this for two reasons. One being my Mom's dog was named Tiger. Two being my kids are the "Fighting Tigers" at their school. The odds are not with this guy. I place a two dollar bet and roll away with $75.00! I bet on a horse named Doug and one named Nina. I choose these because I'm friends with people with these names. I win on both! I win big on Doug because the odds are not with him. I think I'm starting to piss everyone off because I now turned into that obnoxious bragger girl. I'm not proud but it was to much fun. I walked away with 150 bucks!

Here is my super jealous sister again. This time she is mad because I'm so much hotter than her.

I sometimes feel sorry for her. It must be hard to be riding on my coattails all the time.

Did we really just pay eight dollars to dye this kids tongue blue?????

We all head back to my Mom's house after the track. This is the best dog in the world. I hate to say but this pisses my sister off too. She has two obnoxious dogs. My Dad likes my dog much better than hers! Like I said, sometimes it's hard to be me. My Mom didn't go to the track she was cooking and getting ready for all of us to come home. It takes my Mom twice as long as anyone else to get ready for a party. She gets side tracked all the time by little projects that could have waited till tomorrow or next year.

Here are most of the cousins. Oh wait, where's Kelly????? I think I may be the favorite cousin too. It's all about me ya know.

This big ass I don't know what the heck kind of bug this is bit me. It left a giant welt on the back of my leg for almost two weeks. A couple times I got slightly panicked about this bite. I kept checking it to see if it was sprouting any red lines. I heard if a bite sprouts red lines it could be poison. See what my Mom has done to me.

The Grumpy old guy looks pretty happy today. It must be because he got to go to the track with his favorite daughter. It could be the fact that he has knocked a few beers back though. He is a man of few words, you never know what's cooking in that brain of his. Since I am knee deep in post from my Chicago trip I will fill you in on a few things from my day.

While talking to Kelly on the phone she said the words "ABSO-FUCKIN-LUTELY". I have to say I like this made up word. I plan to steal this from her. I'm still number 1 though.

I planned on getting up and working out with my friend but I woke up with my "red wings". Having my red wings gives me an excuse to sit on my ass all day in front of the TV and get a get out of jail free card for several nights. Love those wings! For a while last year I started skipping months so I would have to pretend to have them. Since I started yoga it has thrown my system back in check.

Blake said he was missing a few things from his room. I pulled out the old handy dandy secret camera move on Cole and Aidan. Cole takes me right to his room and opens a drawer where the missing items are sitting. I notice there is a 20 dollar bill in there too. I ask him where he got the 20. He tells me hubby stopped at the bank and got it for him. Now I know hubby and he would never just stop to get him a twenty......he is a tight ass! I have to sneak a 20 out from the cash back button at the grocery store.

I call bullshit on him and tell him I am calling hubby to ask. I ask him if hubby really got him that 20. He very matter-o-factly replies NO! Turns out he took the 20 from Aidan.

While I'm putting the two little guys to bed tonight I tell them they better not get out of bed. Aidan asks me if his arm gets cut off can he get out of bed. I tell him HELL NO! Now go to bed.

All I have to say is if you can't poke fun at the people you love the most who can you poke fun at without getting your ass kicked????? I abso-fuckin-lutely love these people I have to call family. If my Grumpy old guy heard me talk this way I may not be the favorite, but remember grumpy guy I learned to talk this way from Kelly!

Transformers!

While in Chicago we headed down town to watch them film Transformers.

My Mom, my Aunt Maureen, the kids, and me all took the L train down town. My mom and her sister Maureen are big time Debbie Downers. Don't get me wrong they are both a lot of fun to be with, but they kind of have a bad story of a "what if" for everything. They are huge hypochondriacs. They can be almost neurotic in a way. You know the kind of Moms that told you things like "if you don't cut that hot dog up it can get lodged in your throat and kill you." My Mom once told me if I sit on my legs (which I do all the time) I could get a blood clot that will go to my heart and kill me. My Aunt told my pregnant cousin that she needed to be careful going down town because people cut babies out of bellies. My Mom once said someone might chop my finger off to steal my ring. And I wonder why I worry about everything! They can rain on your parade real fast by telling you every possible thing that can go wrong. Sometimes I can almost hear the "WHAAAAA, WHAAAAA, sound going off in my head when they are telling a story. I don't know why but my Mom has a vault full of crazy ass stories about freak accidents and such! I don't know where she hears all this crap. Earlier this week my cousin was doing my hair at the same time she was doing my Aunt Maureen's hair. I was sitting there waiting for my naturally blond hair to process listening to my Aunt tell my cousin every possible thing that could go wrong on her upcoming trip. I don't know how they got this way! They have a brother that does not seem to let all these crazy "what ifs" bother him. Anyway I sat behind them on the L train and listened to them talk about being robbed....LOL! I love these two and mean no disrespect to them. I can't help but call them out on this crap though. The funny thing is neither one of them think they are like this. I sometimes find myself falling into this same path with my kids but then I pull myself back.

These are army men that are in the movie. I'm just hoping to see the hottie Josh Duhamel.

There must be a helicopter scene in this movie because it hovered over us for hours.

The boys have a great day walking around checking out the smashed up cars. Blake is of course texting the whole time.

Being in the city is so much fun. It is so beautiful down there in the summer.

This "SHEMAN" was worth the trip down there. I wish you could have seen my boys faces wondering if that was a dude! I think this is the first time they have seen a "SHEMAN". He looked pretty good but he forgot to tuck his man package away! It was kind of hanging out the bottom of his dress!

I was hotter than HELL out there this day! I don't know how these people could stand to be in this makeup all day.

My Mom bought the boys ice cream. Aidan's falls off his stick! Can you hear the "WHAAAAA, WHAAAAAA" in your head!

This picture pretty much describes how I feel a lot of the time living with these people. We had a great day hanging with the downer sisters! Like I said before I mean no disrespect to them. It's just fun to poke a little fun at them.

Busy weekend!

Saturday was our first official football game. Let me just say it was hotter than HELL out there.

I have a hard time keeping track of my kid on the field since they all look the same out there. I wanted to put some fluorescent green shoe laces on him. Hubby shot that idea down right away!

That's my baby trying to tackle someone twice as big as him. He is the one hanging on the guys ankle for dear life. Did I say it was hotter than HELL out there!

There he is now pretty much under the giant kids shoe! Poor baby, at least he has heart for the game. Saturday night hubby and I were invited to a 50th birthday party. My friend put on a great spread with lots to drink, a live band, and some Greek food. The food was awesome especially the meatballs. The bad thing was we were all standing around in groups chatting and burping up the meatballs. Now these were so good but they did not smell great coming back up. After that party we headed to another birthday party that was super fun. It was so much fun that we did not get in till 2am. Once in a while I seem to forget I need a lot of sleep these days!

Sunday I cleaned and organized the upstairs while the boys went to the pool. When they got home we headed out to eat. At the party the night before my friends 23 year old son was joking around, picked me up and told hubby he was going to take me to downtown Austin with him. Hubby says go ahead I will sell you her for 20 bucks. So on our way out to eat I'm telling hubby I really didn't find that funny at all. He tells me come on I was joking! I tell him that on FB this week I was chatting with my IC friends and we were talking about how we have gone from boy crazy girls to chocolate crazy girls. I then tell him I would like to trade him in for a giant chocolate bunny. He just starts laughing and says, now that is funny. I ain't laughing cause I ain't kidding!

Later tonight I'm on the phone with my Mom. We are talking about something and she says what if this person kills themselves. I just have to start laughing. This it not something anyone would kill themselves over. She asks why I am laughing so hard because things like this really happen. I start laughing even more and tell her I can't believe how dramatic she can be. No wonder I worry about everything! I have crazy dramatic Debbie downer for a Mother. While I'm on the phone Cole gets out of bed and asks me if there is a such thing as a "man eater". I tell him NO and to go back to bed. I get off the phone with my Mom and go up to check on the kids. As I'm coming around the corner to their bedroom something scares the shit out of me. They have their giant stuffed monkey sitting in a chair with swords in his hands guarding the entry to their bedroom. The funny thing is they have the giant monkey duct taped to the chair so I don't know what they think he is going to do for them. If any of you have read my blog regularly you know I tell the kids I have secret cameras in the house. This works like a charm when trying to get to the bottom of something. My kids always throw themselves under the bus right away. I have solved a lot of stuff using this method. My fear is I have ran this train way to long, I keep waiting for them to get smart. My friend GiGi calls me the other day and tells me she has something funny to tell me. Her son was over the other day and Cole, Aidan, and him were kind of messing with the big boys upstairs. I pulled that secret camera thing and then kind of forgot to follow through with it. So GiGi tells me she was putting her son to bed and he says "you know Cole's Mom has secret cameras". She laughs right away because she has read the blog and knows about the secret cameras. He then tells her Cole was supposed to be grounded for hitting his brother but he is not because the secret cameras missed it. We both have to laugh and now she might use my trick as well since her son seemed to fall for this nonsense as well. Gotta love those secret cameras! Anyway may be trading in one of these people for a giant chocolate bunny!